Page 39 of Flirty Thirty

“Just take him.” My nephew is now taking harsh breaths between his wails, making it sound as if he’s a skipping track on a record used as a method of birth control. Cooper carefully takes him from my arms, smile set on his lips as he cuddles with the screaming bundle. He gazes down at the babe, rocking him in his very muscular arms that I know from experience are a lot more comfortable than they look. Chase doesn’t settle down in the slightest—in fact, I think he’s gotten louder—but Cooper doesn’t bat an eye.

“Let’s go outside, yeah buddy?” he says, his voice gruffer than the baby-talk I’m used to hearing around the little guy, yet still so very endearing. I can appreciate that even through this pounding headache.

He takes him out back, bouncing him up and down and patting his little baby bottom. I run a finger across my forehead, praying that the pain subsides once the noise is gone.

“Aya, Aya,” Claire says, pulling on my pant leg, proudly holding up her diaper. “I pee pee.”

I hang my head and let out a long sigh. Of course,thatI understand.

***

My eyes drift up to the massive, decorative clock hanging on the wall in the living room, half the toys from the kid’s room burying me from the waist down as I sip on fake tea—that I’m pretending is wine—with my niece. It’s only been an hour since I passed off the crying baby, and only three since Jim and Katie left to have a day of… not this. How in the world do they do it every day?

“Moobak tafolrof sitvia,” Claire babbles, smacking the teapot against the eyeball of a stuffed horse.

“Uh huh.” My go-to response for this “tea party.” I don’t want to poke the bear; the one time I said, “What, sweetie?” she threw herself flat on her back and screamed at the ceiling.

She yawns, her small mouth opening wide as she relaxes into the horde of stuffed animals. I slowly, cautiously, pluck myself free from all the dress up clothes, play sets, and baby dolls, hoping another screaming session isn’t pending when I get to my feet.

Claire hardly seems to notice my movement, her eyelids drooping. The teapot slips from her fingers as she drifts off.

I have maybe twenty minutes if I’m lucky. With the house suddenly so quiet, I tiptoe over all the toys and head out back to Cooper, holding my breath and hoping Chase too has drifted off to sleep.

Cooper turns his head at the sound of the sliding glass door. He gives me a half-smile, one that is a little lackluster from his usual grin.

“Hey,” I mouth.

“Hey,” he whispers back. Chase sniffles in his sleep against Cooper’s shoulder. “It’s awfully quiet in there.”

“Out here, too.” I take a seat next to him in the twin chaise lounge. “You want to make a break for it?”

He chuckles. “Hell no. This is the part that makes it all worth it.”

My brow raises, like,uh-huh, sure. He only grins at my skepticism.

“I love it,” he says, adjusting in the chair, careful not to disturb the baby against his shoulder. “The noise, the chaos, then the quiet moments that make you wonder what you did to deserve such little blessings.”

“I don’t think you’re using that word right.”

“I’d have fifty of them, if I could.”

I fight away a yawn. “How many do you really want?”

He presses his lips together in thought, his hand patting the tiny bundle in his arms. I have to say, while I scoff at the fake family of the Hallmark card, I feel as if I could snap a picture right now, send it into their headquarters, and make millions.

“Four,” he says after a minute. “Maybe six.”

“Six?”

“Gotta be an even number.” He adjusts again, and I wonder if his rear is past the point of numb.

“Why not two?” I point out while secretly wondering if zero is an even number.

He shakes his head. “I want more than two.”

I rest my chin in my hand, completely puzzled by this man. You’d think after today two would be too many.

“So why an even number?”

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