Page 58 of Doing It for Love

She flicks a loose curl out of her eyes. “Did you convince him?”

“I did. That one was easier than I thought. It’s the…execution that’s the hard part.”

I explain to her the no-sex deal, what’s at stake, and then I’m suddenly babbling about how we’re both trying to get each other to give in. Mom’s equal parts laughing and blushing.

“That explains Mr. Risky Business.”

“Yeah, probably.”

“I have a question, though.”

“Okay.”

“Why cut yourselves off in the first place?”

“You really want to hear this?” I twist my fingers in my lap, wondering how open I should be here. Mom’ll probably have some good insight on making that part of the relationship continually hot over the course of several years. I had to block memories of banging headboards from when I was a kid.

Mom puts her tablet down next to my computer and smiles. “You can talk to me about anything. I’m sure we’ll talk about a lot more when you get pregnant and your body starts doing things you never thought it would.”

“Okay…Landon’s good at, um, satisfying me…?” Lawdy, I’m talking satisfied sex with my mother. She gives an encouraging nod, so I let my chest sort of unknot and keep going. “But, well, the night we got engaged was kind of…meh.”

“So you cut him off sex till the wedding? Seems a bit harsh.” Her shoulders shake with silent laughter. I push on her leg.

“No.It was a weird day that day. My mind was elsewhere and it would’ve taken me a long time to…anyway, I just…my wedding night…it should be perfect. So even after the long day, tired feet and tired minds, I want to be able to…I want to…”

“Orgasm?”

I put my hands over my fiery red cheeks. My mom just said orgasm.

“Was that night the first time you didn’t orgasm? Because I’d say, lucky you!”

“No…butugh,I don’t want to make Landon sound lame, Mom.” But I find it equally mortifying to talk about what a good lover he is too.,

“I’m not going to think that. In fact, I’ll probably try not to think about it at all.”

I let out a sigh and drop my hands. “The first couple times we had sex were a little awkward, but we found out more about each other’s, you know, desires and it waswow.For a long time,wow.But then our lives got…for lack of a better word, busy. And so our hot sessions sort of morphed into…”

“Commercial break sex?”

My eyes widen. “Yes, exactly.”

“That happens to every relationship. It’s okay. When you two are together it’s still intimate and nice, right?”

I slowly nod. “I mean, it’s good between us, mainly because we know what’s what on who and what makes who go ‘OH!’ Even the times I don’t orgasm, it’s been…fun.” Just short.

“That’s good. It should always be fun.”

Itisalways fun. I like fun. I like when he teases me while kissing my neck. I love the smile on his face and the playful bites he gives to my shoulders. The way he always makes me laugh first, then turns those laughs into something else entirely. I miss it…but not nearly as much as something new, exciting, and for our wedding night, the first time with him as my husband, I crave something different. No…not different…more.

“I want passionate.”

“It should be that, too. You love him, right?”

I roll my eyes. “Of course.”

“Then, when it comes to making love, just…love him.” She pats my leg. “That being said, I completely understand wanting to wait. It could help bring back the spark you want.”

“You think?”

---