Page 55 of The White Enchantress

“You honor me, my lady.” Arthur bows his head in thanks. “Lancelot, is this plan acceptable to you?”

“Whatever you need, my king. If you had need of me to ride with you tomorrow, I would go, though part of me would have wanted to stay at home a little bit longer. I thank you for allowing some time to ourselves.”

“I must say, I never thought this day would come. Sir Lancelot, a married man.”

“Why do you say that?” Guinevere asks, looking up from her half-eaten dinner plate. I freeze, afraid of what Arthur will say to her.

“When I was first introduced to Lancelot, a young man of fifteen, he was a bit untamed. You would think growing up surrounded by the beautiful women of Avalon would have made him immune to seduction. Yet temptation was his weakness.”

“I have not let temptation defeat me for quite some time, Arthur.” I call him informally by name as I do on occasions when we are alone and speaking as friends.

“Yes, for years. In summary, my lady, I was afraid that Lancelot would never settle down, jumping from one mistress to the next.And then he held no interest in women at all, until you came along.”

Guinevere’s smile is bright enough to light the darkening room as the sun begins to sink beyond the horizon. I am only glad she does not think ill of me after Arthur’s recounting of my youthful years at court.

“What about Elaine?” She asks with a sneer in her eye.

“Yes, what about Elaine, Lancelot?” Arthur repeats curiously.

“Hmm. She kissed me once. One time. I might have kissed her back. But that was all, I swear.”

“She has always been in love with you. I had thought to arrange your marriage, but in the end, you two did not seem like a good match.”

“I thank you for coming to such a conclusion.” Looking over at Guin, my heart is so full of love. If I had been tied down to another woman before meeting her, what would my life have been? Surely I would have yearned for Guin as I do now. I would have committed adultery, bringing shame to Arthur and Guinevere. Sensing my shifting emotions at the thought of these “what ifs,” Guinevere squeezes my hand, reminding me she is here now; she is mine.

“Your grace, I would like to thank you once again for making the journey up here. Your blessing of our marriage has meant the world to us.” Guin is the picture of a lady. It is still shocking to see her shift into this role. When it is just us, she speaks and holds herself differently. I know now it is because she is comfortable around me, unafraid to let down the mask she puts on for everyone else.

“My pleasure,” Arthur responds with a smile. A smile that quickly turns around. “Though I am deeply saddened by the circumstances that brought you to this moment so quickly. I feel responsible for your capture. Melwas was not to be trusted. I knew this. Yet, I let my guard down, thinking he would honor my hospitality as a guest in my castle. I truly am sorry for what he did to you. Please know this.”

Guinevere looks down at her hands, tears pooling in her eyes. It is my turn to offer her reassurance. But when I reach out to squeeze her hand, she flinches. In the two months since her kidnapping, Guin has healed remarkably, both physically and emotionally. Still, there are little moments like this one when she maybe feels more vulnerable than usual. The moment passes quickly, and she slides her hand beneath mine.

“The fault is nobody’s but Melwas’ and his men,” she says, void of emotion. This is not a topic Guin wants to discuss, yet Arthur keeps pressing, asking her what had happened.

“Arthur, please, this is difficult for Guin–”

“It’s okay, Lance. I don’t really know what you want to hear, Arthur. Melwas took me from my room. Attempted to bring me to his castle and make me his bride and queen. When he…I was tied to a tree. Excalibur appeared, took over my body, fought for me. Next thing I remember, Lance was there.”

“How did Excalibur appear?”

“I don’t know. I can’t really remember anything until I saw Lance.” Guin looks up at me, her green eyes glistening with tears. “If you want to know if Excalibur still resides within me, yes. I can still feel her.”

“It is a miracle,” Arthur decides, ending the conversation.

Later that night, as we lie naked in each other’s arms, Guinevere asks me about the temptations I fell for in my youth. “I do not wish to discuss that with you,” I say curtly.

“Why not? I won’t get upset. I’ve had sex before, plenty of it. I’m not ashamed. You shouldn’t be either.”

“You were not a maiden then? Before Melwas–”

“No. I lost my virginity when I was seventeen. I had boyfriends, a fiancé, and then Josh. It is common in my time to have sex before marriage. Virginity isn’t sacred like it is now.”

“Hmm. How many…boy…friends?” I have no right to feel jealous when I have bedded many women, some of them maidens.

“Do you really want to know?”

“Yes,” I say after hesitating a moment.

“Two boyfriends in high school and three in college.”

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