Page 31 of Big Risks

"No," I say, stepping closer. "What wasn't fair was you carrying it alone all this time."

We stand in awkward silence, and I’m afraid to take my eyes off him. It’s as if the moment I do, he will leave.

"Let’s go in and get you some breakfast," he says, finally taking his eyes away from me.

"I didn't come for breakfast."

His eyes meet mine again, guarded but hopeful. "Why did you come?"

“My heart broke for the man in the letters. But I fell in love with the man standing in front of me. The real man, with a past and scars and a daughter who thinks the world of him."

He takes a step toward me, hesitant. "Hailey, you don't understand. The things I've done—"

"Stop," I say, closing the distance between us. "I understand more than you think. You lost someone you loved and you blame yourself. You think that makes you unworthy of happiness."

"Doesn't it?"

"No." I reach for his hand, twining our fingers together. "It makes you human. And humans mess up, they grieve, and they try again."

His fingers tighten around mine. "I should have told you everything from the beginning."

"Yes, you should have." I don't sugarcoat it. "But I understand why you didn't. Fear makes us do stupid things."

"Like what?"

"Like running away from the best thing that's happened to me in years because I was scared of getting hurt again," I say.

A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. "You think I'm the best thing that's happened to you in years?"

"Don't get cocky, Walker. I'm still mad at you."

He pulls me into his arms. "I can live with that."

I rest my head against his chest, listening to the steady thump of his heart. "I mean it, Walker. No more secrets. No more hiding the hard stuff because you think I can't handle it."

"I promise." His voice rumbles against my ear. "From now on, you get all of me. The good, the bad, and the seriously screwed up."

"That's all I ever wanted."

He pulls back, looking down at me with those eyes that see straight through to my soul. "Can I kiss you now? Because I've been thinking about it since you stepped out of that car."

Before he finishes speaking, I'm already rising on my tiptoes.

His lips meet mine, gentle at first, then with growing urgency. I wind my arms around his neck, pressing closer, wanting to erase any space between us. He tastes like coffee and promises, and I want to drown in him.

“Come back to my place. I have a lot I want to tell you,” he says when we break apart.

When we get to his place, we curl up together on his couch, and he tells me more about Riley. About the good times, not just the tragedy. About the pranks they pulled in school, the way Riley could make anyone laugh, even in the worst situations.

I tell him about my last relationship, about the way I'd let it make me cautious, afraid to trust my own judgment.

We talk until our voices grow hoarse, and the sun starts to set, and he has to go get Olivia. Until all the walls between us have crumbled, leaving nothing but truth.

"I love you," he says, his fingers tracing patterns on my palm. "I think I have from the beginning."

"Even when I was holding up paint colors, and you were telling me they were the same color?"

"Especially then," he smiles.

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