Page 10 of Puck Lust

“You can do it. I know you can. You were awesome in Washington and you’ll be even more awesome here.” He beams so bright, he almost blinds me.

I force a smile, ruffle his hair, and straighten up. “You play hockey, Christopher?”

He nods. “Yes. I mean, I’m not very good yet but I try real hard. I want to be just like you.”

Jesus, this kid is adorable. And even though my mind is spiraling right now, he just reminded me why I’m here, why I work my ass off, and why I can’t let any of this crap with Larson weigh on me.

I have the best freaking job on the planet. That’s what I need to remember.

Fuck whatever happened in the past.

I don’t need to prove my worth.

I don’t need to question a damn thing.

I’m here because I deserve to be.

Nobody will change that. Andnothingwill distract me from the goal of getting a Cup.

Whatever I thought I felt back in that tunnel a few minutes ago won’t even be a thought going forward.

As of right now, any lingering, inconvenient feelings I may havethoughtI had about Jack all those years ago are hereby permanently squelched. I won’t be resurrecting even an iota of concern over him outside of the ice rink.

“I bet you’re gonna be better,” I say, pulling the cap back off the Sharpie and scrawling my name on the flat side of my hockey stick.

He gasps when I hand it to him. “Are you serious? Your hockey stick?”

“Yup. When you grow into that stick, you use it, and every day, work as hard as you can to be the best. And I know it’ll happen for you.”

“Wow!” Christopher shakes the stick in his hand. “Dad, look at this! I’m going to be a star just like VK!”

The smile stays plastered on my face for a few minutes while I watch Christopher and his dad disappear around a corner.

The locker room is empty by the time I push through the double doors. Piles of sweat-drenched laundry sit in bins on either side of the doors as I pass through.

I toss my helmet onto the bench and drop down next to it to unlace my skates. Gritting my teeth, I see Jack’s locker open a crack. But none of his stuff is in sight. Maybe the latch didn’t close properly when he left.

I fist the sides of my hair.

Dammit, I let him creep under myskin again.

Again.

What a joke.

I’m kidding myself in thinking that he ever really left.

I heave a deep sigh and scrape my hands down the front of my face before falling forward onto my hands.

All the good fan feelings that lit me up only seconds ago fizzle away like dying embers.

It’s taken me years to make a name for myself outside of Jack’s shadow. I finally have everything I want, respect of my teammates, loyal fans, fame, glory.

I’ve worked so hard for all of it.

And now he barrels back into my life and threatens it all because he’s got my head spinning like a blender on high speed.

I’d managed to avoid him for the weeks leading up to this game. It was easy to do during practice when everyone was focused on the workouts, and once practices were over, he always pulled a daily disappearing act.

---