Page 104 of The Lies We Told Ourselves

After Booker’s father had left, everyone else had drifted back home. No one really knew what to say or how they were supposed to act. Delaney’s offer had taken them by surprise. The guys needed to figure out their feelings about their father before they were in any kind of place to decide if there was a chance for a relationship with him as well.

Booker had been quiet for days, and Xander had been stomping around the ranch, fighting just about everything he had the chance to. I was staying well away from him, but Booker didn’t seem to have the same luck, and they’d been snapping and rubbing each other the wrong way the whole time.

It didn’t seem to affect their relationship. If anything, they both seemed grateful to have the other to take their frustrations out on.

Men were weird.

But tiptoeing around the two of them was getting old, and there was a lot to do, and I was the last person around here who could figure it out.

So I pulled on my big girl pants and told Booker that it was time to look over the cottages and decide what he wanted to dowith them. I never thought the subject of the failed expansion plans would be one I’d grab onto out of sheer desperation to start a conversation. It felt like the one thing we should have been avoiding the most. And then Jasper had turned up at the ranch and flipped our world upside down.

“Your contractor did a good job,” I said, grasping for something to say as we stood in front of the two cottages and stared at them.

Booker grunted in agreement.

His hands were in his pockets as he stared ahead, but I knew he wasn’t really seeing the two cottages. He was too lost in his thoughts.

They really were lovely, though. This was the first time I’d been up here, really. I loved how they were far enough apart that they had their privacy, and yet the shared yard meant that if it was set up right with some patio furniture, it would be a lovely area to socialize if they wanted to, or if a large enough party booked out both cottages.

“The view is nice.”

Wow, I really was grasping at straws now.

Booker looked up and that old smirk I remembered from when we first met ticked across his lips.

“I’m being a total ass, aren’t I?”

“I wouldn’t say atotalass.” I winced, trying to soften the blow. We both knew the real answer was yes.

Booker and I hadn’t been together for long, and we’d moved fast. I didn’t know whether to leave him to his thoughts or just jump in with both feet and try to help him wade through them.

The old Booker was definitely a hands-off emotions person, but the man in front of me had changed and softened. He was dropping his shields and molding the life he wanted.

I was just lucky enough to be part of the process.

Booker wrapped an arm around me, and I nearly sighed in relief. We headed toward the nearest cottage, and Booker fished a key out of his pocket. The need to make a sarcastic comment about how he’d figured out locks was on the tip of my tongue. I didn’t think I’d ever seen him lock a door until now. Small-town living, I guessed.

I held it back, though. Now wasn’t the time to poke fun at him when he was opening up.

Obviously, I was saving it for later, though.

“This one is two beds, two baths,” Booker said as we stepped inside. “The one across the way has an extra bedroom. They’re both wheelchair accessible.”

There wasn’t any furniture yet, but I could already see it set up as a cozy space. The open plan downstairs even had a fireplace, which would be so nice in the winter. Especially when there was snow outside.

“We could probably furnish them for a reasonable cost,” I said, peering around a door and finding a small laundry room which already had the machines plumbed in. “If you wanted to rent them out.”

I looked over my shoulder to see Booker peering up at the fireplace, and then he straightened again, nodding like there was something up there that he’d expected. He had to be faking it, right?

I didn’t think he was going to answer me at first as he walked over to the window to stare out at the view.

“I was going to let the expansion plans sit for a couple of years. Just spend some time on the ranch like I used to, but this time I’d have you with me.” He looked over his shoulder at me with a soft smile and held out a hand so I’d join him at the window. When I reached his side, he continued. “I love this land. I love having you here and seeing the future I want us to build together. I’m…content. And I don’t think I’ve felt thatbefore. But the happier I get, the more grounded I feel, and the more I think I might want to fight for the expansion too. Do you think that makes me selfish?” He looked at me in question, and I surged up on the tips of my toes to wrap my arms around him.

“Why would that make you selfish, Booker?” I asked in surprise.

“Because I have so much. Because life is perfect, and yet I still want more.” He genuinely looked like he was struggling to understand if he was doing the right thing, and I thanked the universe for giving me this man who couldn’t be any further from selfish even if he tried.

“Booker, you want to show people the ranch and how it can help them. I’ve seen your plans. I’ve seen the numbers. If you were a selfish man, you wouldn’t be working your business based on charging people a fraction of the cost that you could. You wouldn’t be looking into animal therapy and hiring staff experienced in rehabilitation. You’d have structured a business you could have actually made a profit from rather than just trying to cover the costs.”

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