Page 30 of Whizz

“Wow, the boys really weren’tlying about you, were they?Since you were taken you don’t beataround the bush.”He went to apologize, but she held her hand up,stopping any apology he would have said.“Don’t bother to sayanything.It’s true.You’ve gotten hard since Alan.Everyone seesit.”

Whizz wished he could dispute what shesaid.He was a different man, a darker man than he ever thoughtpossible.Cutting off the memory of torturing the man Gonzalez hadsent to kill Eva, he forced himself to focus on Rose.He’d lost apart of himself with Alan.There was no way for him to ever getthat back.This was the man he’d turned into.

“I love kids.Seeing the girls’happiness has not affected my own.I can share their happiness withthem.I think Hardy and I have been hiding from the truth.If itwas just a case of us moving on from what happened, it would havebeen different.I didn’t move on.”She was frowning, staring offinto space as she talked.“I changed who I was.He didn’t changehimself.”She licked her lips, putting the brush onto the table.“Iwasn’t the kind of woman who took her clothes off while dancing forthe whole club to see.”The tears that had been filling her eyesstumbled down her cheeks.“My life was filled with books, cooking,boring mundane crap that Hardy thought was cute.I was a virginwhen he claimed me.”

“I thought you hung around theclub.I thought you were a sweet-butt.”

“I did hang around the club, butI was with a sweet-butt who has since moved on.She stayed around,fucked several of the men, but Hardy caught sight of me and I neverlooked at anyone else.Hardy’s always been like that for me.”Sheshook her head.“We were young, and I was a fucking idiot.All heever had to do was ask me for anything and I gave it to him.Inever made him work hard for me.He had that ability.I don’t knowif every woman was like that.He was the first man I fell in lovewith.”

“Are you going to leavehim?”

“I don’t know.”She started tofiddle with the brush.“I think I need to, but then Iworry.”

Whizz didn’t say anything as she wentsilent in between thoughts.

“I love him.I really do, and Ihate what we’re going through.I wake up, and I think, this daywill be different.I can go back to pretending and forgetting, andthen I look at him or he’ll say something.It doesn’t have to berelevant, and the memories come.I’m pulled back to that moment Irealized the man I loved was fucking another woman.I wish therewas something I could do or say to stop what’s happening to us, butI can’t.”She tucked some of her red hair behind her ear.Her blueeyes blurred with tears.“I don’t know if I can keep pretending tobe something I’m not.This woman you all know, it’s not me.It hasnever been me.”

“You need to do what’sright for you.”

“The club is mylife.”

“Then find a way to forgivehim or a way to move on.Your life isn’t over, Rose.You’re abeautiful woman.Give him a chance to love the woman you oncewere.”Whizz poured them both a coffee.“Just out of curiosity didyou wear glasses?”

Rose chuckled, wiping the tears from underher eyes.“I was the kid who wore glasses, braces—you name it, Ihad it.When I met Hardy, the braces were long gone.I wearcontacts now.”She shrugged.

“I’m not going to tell you whatto do, Rose.The club loves you.You’re part ofus, and Ihope you never turn your back on us.”

“I won’t.”She reachedover, touching his hand.“Thank you, Whizz.”She stood up, grabbinga portable cup.“I’m going to go to the spa to clear my head.I’vegot some decisions to make.Please, don’t tell Hardy where Iam.”

“He loves you,” Whizzsaid.

“I know.He refuses to give meany space, and I need it.”She walked out of the kitchen, leavinghim alone.

Whizz didn’t know how long he sat therebefore Gash made his way into the kitchen.He looked like he’dspent the whole night partying and not enough time sleeping.“Fuck,I feel awful.”

“That’s what you get fordrinking all night.”

“Raven’s been keeping mecompany.I swear she’s got a pussy that’s never satisfied.I’mstarting to think you need to share her in order to give her whatshe really wants.”He poured himself a cup of black coffee, nosugar or milk.“Everyone else asleep?”

“Rose just popped out.She’s goneto the spa, but she doesn’t want Hardy to know.”

“I remember them being so fuckingsolid.I tell you, it shocks me to see them struggling and I’vebeen inside for five years.Everything has changed while I’ve beengone.Lash is settled with a good woman, too damn good for him.Nash became an addict.Tiny finally married Eva.Wherever I turnnew shit is going down.”Gash took a sip, wincing.“Fuck, thatshit’s horrible.”

“I can’t make coffee.”Whizz took a sip, used to his brew.

“I was hoping Angel was up.She cooks the best food.”

Stink walked into the room next followedby Sandy.The two were inseparable nowadays.Sandy didn’t want tosleep with the club, and Stink had offered to keep her within hisroom without hitting on her.Stink was in love with Sandy, who hadbeen a club whore up until she was hurt.Whizz knew the man woulddo anything to claim her as his own.She’d stopped sleeping withthe men a couple of years ago, but Stink hadn’t made hismove.

“What are you doing today?”Whizz asked.

“I’m sticking around theclub.Tiny’s asked for me to wait before I take out my revenge.”Gash shrugged.“I’ve got no choice but to wait for the bitch topay.”

“Whatever Tiny says isusually right,” Sandy said, sitting beside him as Stink grabbed acoffee for himself.

Prue rounded the corner carrying Markus onher hip.Frowning, Whizz looked at Prue then at Markus.“You’ve allgot dirty minds.I passed Killer and Kelsey’s room.I heard herthrowing up, and Markus was screaming.Killer needed some help, andI adore this little guy.”Prue pressed a kiss to the boy’s cheek.“Seriously, I’m in love with Zero.You’re all dirtybastards.”

“I didn’t think anythingabout it,” Sandy said, holding her hands up insurrender.

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