Page 88 of Duplicity

‘But I thought she was in the ICU.’

‘It’s standard for a major operation like that,’ Athena says, and her voice is so calm and assured that I could kiss her. ‘They’re just observing her.’

‘Okay. Great. That’s good. And—sorry, why go to the US?’

‘Duke has the world’s leading paediatric cardiothoracic surgeons,’ she explains patiently, and I realise she’s already told me this over the phone. ‘Plus, they did it laparoscopically. Over here, it would have meant open-heart surgery. The NHS was dragging its feet and Great Ormond Street couldn’t operate before November in any case. Tabby didn’t have time to wait.’

Great Ormond Street. The gala that I treated as a chance to flaunt my boring-as-fuck supermodel trophy on the red carpet was actually raising money for families like Marlowe’s. A wave of nausea and self-disgust rolls through me.

‘How do you know she didn’t have time to wait?’ I ask. My voice sounds thick. My brain feels thick. Cotton woolly.

Athena and Gabe exchange a glance that looks significant. ‘Her blue spells have been getting more frequent,’ she says. ‘That’s what we call it when her lungs are deprived of blood—she starts to turn blue in places. Her A&E visits have been ramping up.’ I stare at her in horror. Every single new piece of information is like a blow to the stomach, but she’s rattling them off matter-of-factly, as if all these nightmare scenarios aresomething she’s profoundly familiar with. ‘They used to only happen when she exerted herself,’ she continues, ‘but they’ve been happening more and more. We’ve all been on tenterhooks over it.’

We’ve all been on tenterhooks. We.I glare at my brother. ‘Do you know her?’

‘Tabs? Yeah, I’ve met her once or twice with Marlowe at Athena’s,’ he says, and I flinch. Tabs. They’ve all been playing happy families and sharing this burden with Marlowe and I’ve been fucking oblivious this entire time.

‘Then why the fuck didn’t she tell me?’ I ask, the frustration in my voice audible even to me, because I’m feeling stupid now.

Athena gives me adon’t be obtuselook. ‘Come on, Brendan.’

‘Come on, what? How the hell does my assistant have a sick kid and no one thinks to tell me?’

‘It was deliberate,’ she says in her measured voice, ‘and I’m sorry if that stings, but there was no way you would have hired her if you’d known her circumstances, and she really needed this job. She needed the money.’

I feel like I’m wading through treacle here, but my brain is fuzzy and overstimulated and I can’t work out what the fuck connection I’m failing to make. ‘What for? The flights? The trip?’

‘For theoperation, Brendan. It’s costing her a fortune, but she was out of options. GOSH had a six-month waitlist and Tabby needed that operation urgently. It was looking increasingly likely that an emergency op would happen, which would have been far too risky and far too invasive.’ She steps forward, her brow creased, and puts a hand on my arm. ‘Marlowe needed to find a way to get hold of hundreds of thousands of pounds as quickly as possible, and she flat-out refused to let me pay for it.’

She clears her throat delicately. Her hand is cool against my bare arm, but it doesn’t help to dispel the nausea that’s risinginside me like a relentless tide. ‘The only option was Seraph, and I suggested you, because I was absolutely bloody terrified for her and I knew you’d look after her. I knew I could trust you. Honestly, it was the only way I could, in all decency, propose her for Seraph. Yes, she was insistent on earning the funds herself, but the way I saw it, someone as inexperienced as Marlowe signing herself up for sex work was like throwing herself into the lion’s den. She hasn’t had a boyfriend since Tabs was born, for God’s sake.’

I stare at her, bile filling my mouth with rancid acid.

She needed the money.

I knew you’d look after her.

I knew I could trust you.

Throwing herself into the lion’s den.

She hasn’t had a boyfriend since Tabs was born.

I hired a beautiful, smart, sexy, obliging woman so I could use and abuse her. I knew Marlowe was classy, knew she had integrity, but figured she had experience, at the very least. I figured she wanted a certain lifestyle and was prepared to do what it took to fund that lifestyle.

I fucked her in every position.

I made her suck my friend off while I took her from behind.

I dragged her into my blokey, boozy lunch and tried to finger her. Oh, Jesus.

I intentionally humiliated her.

I treated her like a whore.

I used every trick in the book the other day to make her feel like a piece of fucking meat in front of my mates.

And she was doing it all to save her daughter’s life.