Page 94 of Duplicity

‘Oh my God!’ I croak. I can’t believe what I’m seeing. ‘What are you—how did you?—’

She jerks her head towards the door with a knowing smile, and I follow the gesture.

Oh God oh God oh God.

Now I really am dreaming.

Because standing right across the bed from me, looking like a walking thirst trap in a dazzling white t-shirt and jeans, is Brendan.

I blink and reflexively reach up to brush my hair out of my eyes. I must look like shit. I mustsmelllike shit. I haven’t showered in days. I’m groggy as hell from that nap, and I’d putmoney on having blanket creases on my face, and this guy looks perfect. Just perfect.

We stare at each other for a moment. The expression on his gorgeous face is so far from the usual easy smugness. It’s more akin to total devastation, and I realise in a rush that the very fact that he’s here means he knows.He knows everything. Instinctively, I reach my hand up to grab Athena’s for comfort. She squeezes hard.

‘I can’t believe you’re here,’ I say lamely to both of them, but mostly to Brendan.

‘We came on Brendan’s jet.’ Athena bends and kisses me on the cheek. ‘He was worried about you. We both were.’

I brave eye contact with Brendan again.

‘I hope it’s okay that I’m here,’ he says. He sounds far more subdued than normal.

Rather than open that can of worms, I shoot him a look I hope communicates my conflicted feelings about seeing him. ‘How did you find out? Did you tell him?’ I ask Athena.

‘No,’ he says. ‘I called you last night and one of the nurses answered the phone. She wouldn’t give me any information except that you were in intensive care, so I called Athena.’ He pauses. ‘She filled me in.’

‘So you found out my secret and decided to just show up?’ I can feel the defensiveness rising. ‘After what happened at that lunch, you think you can just fly across the Atlantic and everything's fine?’

Even as the words leave my mouth, I know I’m being a bitch. Dropping everything to fly over here is a massive deal for him. But I’m so exhausted, and I’m all out of fucks to give. He doesn’t get to erase all that nasty shit he pulled last week with one grand gesture.

‘No.No. Not at all. I know’—he clears his throat—‘I fucked up. But I was hoping I could come and lend a hand anyway.’

He turns to Tabby, who’s still sleeping. I watch as he takes her in, watch as my two worlds collide in a way I could never have imagined. The man on my Instagram feed, the man who knows me more intimately in some ways than anyone else on the planet and from whom I’ve kept this side of myself a secret, the man at whose hands I’ve had my highest highs and lowest lows, has flown across the Atlantic Ocean to be by my side, and I can’t compute it at all.

‘How is she?’ he asks gruffly.

‘She’s good. It’s all gone smoothly. The surgical team has been amazing. We got out of the ICU this morning.’

‘Glad to hear it.’ He shoves his hands in his pockets and looks around the chaotic ward. For a childless guy with a lifestyle like his, this must feel like the Twilight Zone. ‘Oh,’ he says. ‘She’s?—’

I turn towards Tabby. She’s blinking sleepily and reaching for her headphones. I smile at her and lean over so I can get them off her. ‘Hey, sweetie! Look who’s come to see us!’ Her look of shock is downright comedic.

Athena squeezes behind me so she can get to Tabs. ‘Hey, darling!’ she cries, leaning over her for a careful hug, because Tabs is still hooked up to various monitors. ‘Oh my goodness, I’m so proud of my brave girl! Surprise!’

My daughter gets the most animated, most demonstrative side of Athena. They have such a special relationship. I watch as she wraps her little arms around her godmother’s shoulders to hug her, my heart filling with warmth at what it will mean to Tabs to understand that we are not alone, that we are loved, that we have people in our lives who will cross oceans to be with us.

‘How did you get here?’ she asks with wonder in her voice.

Athena releases her and straightens up. ‘I flew here in Brendan’s jet! Imagine that!’

Tabby’s mouth drops open. ‘Cool!’ She swivels her head to Brendan and takes him in, going instantly quiet. I’m not surprised she’s shy around a huge, bearded stranger.

‘This is Brendan, my love,’ I tell her. ‘My boss. Isn’t it so kind of him and Athena to come and visit?’

‘Is ityourjet?’ she asks quietly, and I stifle a grin. Brendan may have found a rapt audience to show off his toys to.

‘Well, it’s my company’s jet,’ he says a little awkwardly, but then he winks at her. ‘I kind of stole it.’

Her jaw practically hits the bedcovers, and I can’t help but laugh.

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