Page 95 of Penance

“Now!” the male voice demands, my stomach rolls as a hand grabs my wrist.

I try to pull back, but my strength is non-existent.

“Huxley!” I try to shout, but my words come out all wrong, too quiet, my tongue thick in my mouth.

“Shut the fuck up and move. He’s not coming for you, he’s the one that let me in,” the man mocks, a deep chuckle rumbling from his chest as he rips the cannula from my hand.

What?

I flop out of the bed as he tugs my arm sharply, my legs not knowing how to work properly. He huffs at me impatiently as I fall to my knees. My bones smashing into the hard floor. Without the use of my injured hand and the other held hostage by my possible kidnapper, I fall forward hard. My chin ricocheting off the linoleum, my teeth crashing together, blood pooling in my mouth. I gag as my head spins. The man pulling me up sharply, my shoulder cracking. I try to spit my mouthful of blood out, but I can’t even manage that. Instead, it all just dribbles down my chin.

Blinking hard, still trying to get my eyes to actually see, I’m dragged down the corridor. My feet still working to get under me. Where is everyone? I swing my head side to side, looking for someone, something. A person, a weapon, a fire alarm. My eyes hazy and unfocused, the room spinning, my brain like mush. I heave again, nothing in my stomach to come up, acid burning my chest. My vision getting worse instead of better, the more I blink the hazier everything gets. The light burns, the darkness threatens.

Cold air blasts me and I’m falling again. Murmured voices surround me, my cheek pressed into cold concrete. Why can’t I move?Come on, come on, come on.

My mind wanders as my hearing finally disappears. Why would Huxley let a stranger into my room, he wouldn’t, this man’s a liar. Huxley will know I’m missing by now and he’ll find me. He would never let anything happen to me. I just have to wait, I trust him to come. I’m not alone anymore. And I have something to live for, and I will live for them, for us. Because they need me as much as I need them. And if one of them were missing I’d burn the whole world until I found them. I know they’ll do the same for me.

My lungs constrict, air bubbling out of me, ice water smothering me, I’m thrown to the floor. A different floor.

What the hell?

“Rise and fucking shine, little love,”hisvoice mocks.

This one is familiar. Eerily familiar. Something inside my mind crumples, years of abuse burned his voice into the inside of my skull. I could never,everforget this evil.

I gasp for breath, spluttering up water from my lungs, burning its way up my throat. I lurch forward on all fours, crying out as I land on my newly braced hand, the big clunky box it was in now gone. Hands grab me. I kick and squirm to get away from him, but everything is too slow, my limbs heavy and weighted. My spine slams into a wooden chair, pain screaming through my veins, I grit my teeth. Someone else’s hand wrapping around my throat. I suck in one last lungful of air, blinking my eyes in the dark room.

My wet hospital gown freezing me to the bone. I shiver and shake as rope is wound around my body, thick and rough and tight. Too tight. The fingers at my throat release, my head flopping forward. Too heavy for my fragile neck to hold up, spit dribbles from the corner of my mouth, my breathing ragged. A hand fists my hair, yanking my head back. I groan, the reaction delayed even to my own ears. My neck arched back painfully, my spine threatening to pierce through my throat. I look up into an all too familiar pair of beady brown eyes, gaunt cheeks and thick eyebrows, hair that needs a good wash.Hegrins at me. My former personal officer from juvie, also known as my rapist.

“How you feelin’, little love?” he cocks his head at me, a silver capped tooth glinting in his ugly smile.

“Fuck. You.”

With that, using all the strength I can muster, I spit in his face. His hand ripping my hair from the root.

“They said you’d be hard to break now,” he muses, almost happily. Using the back of his other hand to wipe my saliva from his cheek. “But the difference is, I know all the nasty little things that can really make you scream. Don’t I, little love.”

I want to whimper, break down and cry. Remembering what teenage Kyla-Rose suffered through. Adult Kyla-Rose swearing never again. And now I’m back there, withhim.Haven’t I suffered enough yet?

When will it ever be enough?

He shoves my head down, my chin slamming into my breastbone. Tearing his hand away, what feels like half my head of hair going with him. He shakes out his hand. I watch from beneath my lashes as my long silver strands drift to the floor when his hand snaps out. His fist connecting with my face so hard I momentarily see stars as my face flies to the right. I work my jaw, righting myself as much as I can. My ankles tied to the chair legs, my arms and torso bound to the chair back. Not that I could move, even if I weren’t, even if I wanted to. I’ve been drugged, that much is obvious. I can hardly keep my head up on my own shoulders.

“I think we could go a few rounds before the real fun starts,” he sneers.

That evil glint in his eye, like he’s reliving every sick depraved thing he did to me way back when. Sniffing, he pulls his arm back again, his fist connecting with the same cheek.

Once he feels he’s beaten my face a sufficient number of times, stopping only before breaking my jaw. He splays his hands over his thighs, his rancid breath in my face. I defiantly lift my head, my brows pulled together, a sneer on my face. He smiles, caustic and challenging, he thrives on defiance.

“How you feelin’ now, little love?”

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” I laugh, spitting one of my molars to the floor in a puddle of blood.

He sneers, his fist connecting with my stomach, my body wanting to curl in on itself, unable to because of my bindings. I breathe through the pain. He paces in the space before me, the room bare, concrete, no windows, a single door, that I can see anyway. I don’t know what’s behind me, I imagine a bath of water somewhere. I did wake up half drowning.

“Tell me somethin’, little love. Why d’you think you’re here?”

I shrug, as much as I can, defiance only growing the more he tries to break me.

---