Page 76 of Devotion

“Da. She lives…somewhere else.” Her soft smile tells me everything. That it’s her secret. And she’s offering me this in kind. How did I get so damned lucky?

I leave her to lie down. It’s been one hell of a night.

But I can’t sit still. And there is a task that I can save her from having to do. Heading out to the old shed, I find a shovel. Out at the tree line, a small gap at the top of a hillock overlooks a pond. So I get to work digging.

A few hours later I pause, wiping the sweat and grime from my face. It’s only the late afternoon, but the sun goes down so early this time of year, especially this far north. Still, I got the job done before dark.

Heading back toward the house, I see her watching me from the kitchen window. Without a word, Vanya follows me to the van.

Together, we carry Matvey around the house, gently laying him in the ground.

The sun dips past the tree line. Dark settles.

Dinner is just enough to fill us. Then we both clean up. When I lay down next to her, I fall asleep almost instantly.

“Wake up, dingus.” A familiar voice stirs me.

Ero is sitting in the chair by the window, staring at me with black, empty eyes.

“Oh. It’s one of those lurid dreams.” I sigh, trying to close my eyes.

“Lucid dreams, fuckwit.” Ero huffs, rolling his eyes.

“Pretentious, even from beyond the grave. What do you want, Ero?” I shouldn’t be so put out. I should be happy to see him, even this way. But I’m exhausted. Trying to fucking sleep.

“Let me sleep. Or let me wake up. There’s a hot Russian goddess lying in bed next to me right now who I’d much rather talk to.”

“Cold. Even for you, joker. Choosing her over me. Just like your new home. Just like your new family. Cold.”

“I didn’t have a choice. I’m sorry.”

“Neither did I. Now I’m stuck with you, haunting your dreams.”

“Wake up, wake up, wake up.” I try to pinch myself, to force myself up. “What do you want from me?”

“Just to tell you that you’re going to lose them too. Your new family. Just like you lost us.”

“I still have her. I still have Vanya.”

“Check again, Ciro. Your bed is empty.”

I bolt upright, gasping.

The sheets next to me are cold.

Snagging my jeans, I hop the bed, landing on my butt, flinging my legs into my pants and rushing into the living room. No sign of her.

I’m out the door in a heartbeat, noting the van is missing. Running out onto the driveway, I turn a quick circle, wondering what to do. It’s still dark, hard to see.

Rushing back toward the house, I hurry inside, grabbing my boots, a shirt. I’m halfway to the door when I look out across the backyard. Moonlight casts deep shadows, all silver and blue.

And there she is.

Standing at Matty’s grave.

My heart stops pounding as I step out the back, dragging my shirt on in the chill. As I approach, I notice how shaky she looks. Her coat, lying in the grass. Her harness, fully loaded next to it with two polished Glocks.

Out at the back corner of the shed I spot the van, the back doors open. She must have been loading it up from the stash case behind the old wooden building. Gunmetal glistens in the moonlight.

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