Page 28 of The Wisteria Tree Cottage

‘You hate it.’

‘I couldn’t possibly hate it. I might look at it and think that the story has holes in it or the characterisation needs to be stronger or it doesn’t flow as well as other books I’ve read, but I couldn’t hate it because it’s written by you.’

‘But you might think less of me,’ Bear said.

‘Bear, I promise you, there is nothing you could do that would make me think less of you. You’re my favourite person in the whole world.’

A slow smile spread across his face.

‘Writing a book, with a proper beginning, middle and end is really hard so you’ve already impressed me. And if you can’t face sending it to me, you could still send it to an agent or a publisher.’

‘I’m not sure it’s good enough for that.’

‘But you won’t know until you try. My friend is an author so I know a little about how things work. If you submit to an agent or a publisher and they like it but don’t feel it’s ready for publication then they may send you some advice, things for you to change. If they really like it, they’ll even work with you to make it perfect. But you can’t let the rejections get you down. Books, films, TV programmes are very subjective. What one person loves, another will hate. It’d be a very boring world if we all loved the same things. Getting a deal is about the book being seen by the right person at the right time. And things have changed in publishing now. Self-publishing is equally as valid as having a publisher. You’d have to market it, but you know marketing from running the ads for Wishing Wood. You could just tailor the ads to sell your books instead. But I know you could make a huge success of it.’

‘You haven’t read the book yet, it could be shite.’

‘But I know you. You are an incredible man, Bear Brookfield. You’re the sort of man who can do anything once you put your mind to it. But if we’re going to date,’ she gestured to their little fake arrangement. ‘Then you need to learn to share all of yourself, not keep some parts locked away.’

Bear smiled and nodded. ‘OK, I promise I’ll think about it.’

‘Good. Now shall we try the calamari?’

‘OK, I’ll cut a bit off and we can try it together,’ Bear said. He sliced a chunk off and then cut that into two pieces. He skewered one piece on his fork and held it across the table for her to eat, which felt a bit intimate. She leaned forward and carefully bit it off the fork.

‘Mmm, it’s a lot more tender than I thought,’ Meadow said. ‘Tastes a bit like chicken.’

She picked up the other piece with her fork and held it over the table for Bear to eat. His eyes locked with hers as he took it off the fork and then he chewed it, clearly considering it.

‘That does taste good.’

She watched him lick his lips, which made a kick of desire jolt through her. She was definitely going to enjoy this date.

CHAPTERSIXTEEN

Meadow licked her spoon after eating the most delicious crème brûlée. The date had been wonderful. Bear had held her hand for most of the evening, he’d been attentive, full of compliments, shared his food and been just utterly lovely. Under the guise of being on a date, she felt like she had discussed things she had never spoken about before tonight. They’d talked honestly and it felt like no subject was off the table.

‘Thank you for tonight,’ Meadow said. ‘It’s been the best first date I’ve ever been on. Any woman would be lucky to have you in their life. You’re the most incredible man. Kind, funny, generous, brilliantly clever.’

‘That’s kind of you to say, but there’s a big difference between what we have, this wonderful close friendship, and that kind of love where you want to be with that person forever, as we told Star this morning.’

‘I don’t know about that. I was chatting to Leah today. Her and Charlie have recently got married, she’s expecting his baby in a few months.’

He blinked in surprise. ‘Wow, they’ve been friends forever.’

‘Yes, and when Star asked her if she loved Charlie with carousel love or rollercoaster love, she said it was both. That she loved Charlie as a friend, that loyal, unwavering kind of love, the love of his companionship, but she loved him with that pure unadulterated joy of rollercoaster love too. I think friendship is a wonderful start to a relationship. I imagine their relationship will last forever because they have such strong foundations to build on.’

He stared at her as he finished off his coconut ice cream.

‘Do you ever wonder why we never got together?’ Bear said. ‘When we were younger it felt like we were going that way and then suddenly we weren’t.’

She groaned. ‘I know why.’

‘You do?’

‘Because I was a silly, immature girl who made some terrible decisions. I regret the way I acted after our kiss, the things I said and did. Everything that happened between our kiss and me finding out I was pregnant around six weeks later, I regret it all. Those weeks after the kiss changed the course of my life forever and while I can never ever regret having Star, the circumstances around her conception, I regret that more than anything. I regret that my actions hurt you, that was never my intention. I regret that my immaturity meant that we never spoke about it at the time and that made things so much worse. So yeah, I have a few regrets about that time.’

Plus the secret made all the worse by eight years of hiding it from him. She regretted that too in many ways though she knew she could never tell him.

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