Page 164 of Chaos

“Boyfriend, huh?”

My face drops. “I didn’t say that.”

“Pretty sure you did.”

I scoff—I panic, just a little. “I think you’re going senile.”

His hum is way too pleased. As smug as the curve of his mouth, a smirk that he presses to my downturned lips, murmuring against them, “Call me that again.”

“Senile?” Finn nips my bottom lip with a playful growl, but I don’t give in. “I believe our boss gave us an order, darling.”

Sighing, he pulls back and starts the truck. “Right. Last day of work before your brother fires me.”

“Oh, please. He’d get rid of me in a heartbeat over his little golden boy.”

“Little?”

I raise my hand, holding my thumb and forefinger an inch apart. “Teeny tiny.”

Rolling those pretty eyes, Finn grabs my hand, playfully biting the meaty part of my palm before kissing the center of it. He holds it hostage as he drives, interlocking our fingers and resting them on his thigh, and I just… stare. At our hands, athim, at the horizon, blinking rapidly as the reality of what just happened sinks in.

Wrenching my gaze away, I stare at the roof as I quietly admit, “You’re the first guy my brother’s ever met.”

A beat of silence. Then a soft, teasing, “The first guy? In the whole, wide world?”

I try to wrench my hand from his—to absolutely no avail.

“Go on.” He squeezes once, prompting. “Say it again.Properly.”

Fuck me.“You're the firstboyfriendmy brother’s ever met.”

“Who’s boyfriend?”

“Jesus Christ.” I huff before tilting my head in his direction. “You’remyfirst boyfriend that my brother’s ever met. Happy?”

“Ecstatic.”

I pause. Swallow. Shift and feel my face flush red as I mutter, “You’re my first boyfriend.”

Finn pauses. Swallows. Shifts, and I feel my face flush even redder as he lifts our joint hands again and mouths against the back of mine, “Even better.”

39

Behind the barn.

On the front porch.

In the bed of his truck, and on the hood of it too.

He has her everywhere he can, every way he can.

Except for all the way.

Even that, he doesn’t think will be enough.

I wonderif Lux drives me to and from Ponderosa Falls because she wants to make sure I actually go to my meeting, or if it’s because Jackson is too traumatized to see me in a truck.

Both are probably true—the former, definitely. An hour after I walk into the community center, I walk out to find Lux parked in the exact same spot I left her in, a thin layer of undisturbed snow tattling on her.

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