Page 68 of Chaos

Going without her was like going without a piece of myself, and if the matching sheen reflected in hazel irises is anything to go by, I wasn’t alone in that sensation.

There’s so much to say. So much we need to talk about. So much to catch up on, to digest, to fucking repent for, but we both know now isn’t the time.

“Hey.” Eyes the mirror image of mine shift to Eliza. “Is Finn still there? Ask him who’s the better-looking twin.”

“Oh, he’ll say Lottie.” Cradling her squirming son, Lux sits up enough to pinch my cheek. “They went skinny-dipping yesterday.”

“Swimming,” I correct, but it’s too late.

Girlish, wince-inducing squeals already echo around my attic.

“What the hell?” My twin exclaims, wood creaking wherever she is as she throws herself on what I assume is her bed. “You’ve been home for, what, two weeks and you’ve already bagged a hand?”

“I have notbagged a hand.” I slide Lux a threatening glare. “Why would you do that?”

“Because it’s fun.” Lips stretched in a wide grin, Lux smacks a kiss to my temple before rolling out of bed, hauling Alex with her. “You’re taking the weekend off. No buts. Stay off that ankle and—don’t give me that look. You think I’m blind? Stay off it. I’m serious. You go to your meeting tomorrow and you come to family dinner, but that’s it.”

“Yes, mother,” I flippantly remark, my breath catching when I realize what I’ve said.

Lux’s does too. Flashing across her face, I see the same thoughts running through my own mind, the same replay of last night, of what she told me.

Expression so soft it makes my chest hurt, she bends to drop another kiss on me, on the top of my head this time,maneuvering Alex when he demands to do the same. “Get ready. We’ll be downstairs.”

“You’re staying?”

“Me and the girl,” she nods at Eliza, “and the boy,” she tickles the tummy of the toddler wriggling in her grip, “are taking the day off too. Thought we could use some time together.”

“Uh-huh,” our little sister agrees emphatically, downright erratic as she bounces on her knees. “And we can use it talking about Finn.”

Groaning as all three of my sisters’ fucking ears prick—asAlex’sears prick, the kid feeding off the palpable curiosity even though he has no real idea what he’s so curious about—I scramble out of bed only to swallow another despondent noise when an onslaught of aches and pains attack my poor, battered body.

Restraining the urge to whimper, I limp to my dresser and snag some of toiletries sitting on top, already concocting grand plans of spending at least an hour in a steaming hot shower. “You guys know more about Finn than I do.”

“NotnakedFinn.”

My baby sister. Interested in naked men. Kill me. “We were not naked.”

As Eliza and Grace snort their disbelief, Lux hums a thoughtful, teasing noise. “Y’know, your clothes didn’t look all that wet yesterday.”

I scowl at her. Backed in a goddamn corner, I say through gritted teeth, “We swam in our underwear.”

Eliza squeals.

I wince as the noise adds a pair of burst eardrums to my list of ailments. “Have you always been this boy-crazy—”emphasis on the crazy.“—or is this a new development?”

“I appreciate the male form,” she corrects, all matter of fact. “Now tell me all about Finn’s.”

“Yeah, Lottie.”

For a brief second, I close my eyes and scream internally.

And then, I slowly turn around just in time to watch a smirking man haul himself and a precariously balanced breakfast tray into the attic. “Do tell.”

I wet my bottom lip. “Average.”

Up goes a brow. “Oh, yeah?”

“And that’s being generous.”

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