Page 183 of Tainted Romance

I took my hand off her hip and gripped her hand which was keeping me away from her. I took it, bringing it to my mouth and kissed the back of it.

I brought it to my face. Maybe if she felt me, she would be less nervous and looking like she wanted to bolt.

Her hand was on the side of my face when I took a step closer to her. I looked at her torn expression. She was a second from bolting and a second from pulling me closer.

My other hand ran up her arm.

“Ebony told you the truth? Right?” My hand went to her face, my thumb running over her bottom lip. “You know that trust you gave me, I didn’t break it?”

She was still. Deadly still. If it weren't for her blinking and hearing her heart racing, you would think she was dead.

“Allie, you have to hear me when I say I didn’t break your trust. I never wanted to hurt you.” I couldn’t stop myself from kissing her forehead. “Tell me you believe me?” Please believe me. The last thing I wanted was to see her hurt. The last thing I wanted was for her walls to go back up and for her to push me away and leave.

She still wasn’t moving. God, what was she thinking? I could get my answer. Maybe if I reached into her mind, I could answer whatever it was she was panicking about and keeping her from answering me. I knew how much she hated me in her head, but I didn’t see another option.

Blake said Ebony wasn’t lying, but she was a living breathing lying machine and Zane wouldn’t lie to me, would he? He has before, but he had told me over and over they hadn’t slept together. I was the one to decide they had after listening to Ebony.

Was she lying in the bathroom the other day?

Did it make a difference?

Yes. It bloody well did. She had me ready to leave. Hell, I’ve even already asked to be released! Why is he looking at me like that? Why did it feel like I was risking everything by trusting him again?

Don’t do it. Don’t give in. Push him away. This time I have to listen to my brain. My heart got me with a mark on my neck and a mindful of doubts. God, all he did was give me nightmares! This was a nightmare right now deciding whether to believe him or not.

I had pushed him so deep into my soul for too long. Now it was showing. I wanted to believe him. My heart was pumping firm to that, but my brain keeps telling me, we are just going to end badly.

Alpha Harris said if I really loved him. I would let him go from loving me. That’s what I was doing and if I kissed him right now, as much as I wanted to, it would be even harder to say goodbye to him at the end of the year.

“MY DAD SAID WHAT!”

Her eyes snapped up. “Of course, you were in my head!” She pulled her hand off my cheek. “Would it kill you to give me privacy?”

“In this case, yes, it would kill me because you leaving would kill me. Hear that, Allie. If you really loved me, you would be staying, not running away!”

“Your dad said the opposite to that.” She looked at me like I couldn’t argue that. “When he heard you were still sleeping with other women, even though we were marked. He said you wouldn’t be able to stop it.”

“BUT I WASN’T! DOES NO ONE LISTEN TO ME?” I was yelling at her, but I couldn’t stop myself. My built-up rage over this whole situation was getting the best of me.

“Zane, calm down.”

“NO!”

“Seriously, calm down.” She put her hand over my heart. “It feels like you are going to have a heart attack or rip this place apart.”

How could dad do that! How the fuck could he get involved like that! He knew how important she was to me. She was my everything, and he was encouraging her to leave! WHY THE HELL WOULD HE DO THAT!

“Zane. Calm down.”

Was everyone out to make sure she didn’t end up with me? Ebony. Dad. Blake. THE FUCKING WORLD!

“Zane, seriously, you are like a second from changing.”

Why would dad encourage her to leave! Telling her shit like if she really loved me, she would let me go. Where the hell do people get off being involved in my life! MY LIFE! Everyone else and their opinions could get screwed.

Suddenly, I wanted to head back just to tell him that. I wondered what he would be thinking when I did what Ryder did, and wipe my hands of the pack and fucking follow her. What would he do then?

The pack always had come first, but if I had to pick between the two, I knew which one was coming second now.

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