Did he not think it was going to be hard for me? To just withdraw from his life? It was going to hurt.
"You and I, Zane, are what we have always been. We are a big fat question mark because I don't know if we are friends, enemies, or lovers. What we are isn't explainable, and I really don't think my walking out that door and moving home is going to change us." If anything, it would make me want him more, but I wasn't going to tell him that. "So just let me go home."
***
How is it possible for everything you thought you knew to turn upside down so quickly? Sure, my family was screwed up, and yeah, things weren't perfect at home, but that wasn't what had my stomach in knots.
It was stupid Zane.
I had always intended on moving back home at some point. Heck, any rational person would assume that. I had told Zane that me moving home didn't change anything between us. That me not being at the pack house wouldn't stop us from still being friends or whatever it is we were going to be.
Clearly, Zane had thought otherwise.
I shot a glance over my shoulder. How could he pretend that I just didn't exist? My eyes snapped back to the blank paper in front of me. I couldn't do the stupid activities the teacher was asking because all I could do was eavesdrop on Zane's conversation.
What really sucked was now I couldn't even reach into his mind. The pack doctor said that my disconnection had reached a dangerous level. Mom was being a natural mother worrying over me, but it was Alpha Harris’s reaction that gobsmacked us.
He asked if I could not mention it to Zane.
Mom didn't understand, and neither did I. He also made it clear that no one was to find out Zane and I were mates.
I was getting the impression that he was ashamed of me. I mentally scoffed to myself, of course, he was. The pack didn't know I existed. I never took part in anything pack-related, and I had always made it clear that I would be leaving once I could.
I shouldn't be surprised that they were blocking me out.
"You alright, Winters?" Blake towered over me.
I couldn't remember the last time he had spoken to me. Just like the rest, he had been blocking me out, although he did it for a different reason. Funny how that reason circled back to bloody Zane.
I shrugged my shoulders. I wasn't talking much lately. Didn't really have the energy to fight or talk about pointless subjects.
"You look like shit." He slumped down in the empty chair next to me.
He looked different, his features seemed sharper. I frowned slightly. "You've changed."
He arched his eyebrows. "What you talking about?"
"Your arms look different and your face…" I couldn't pinpoint what it was, but I knew something had changed.
"Been doing a lot of work at the gym. Just drop it," he said, and the embarrassment that lingered behind his words was clear to me.
That was what it was. He had lost weight and toned up, although he already was a tank to begin with.
"You got plans for tonight?" Blake changed the subject very smoothly, and I suppressed my smile.
"Nope."
"Wanna come to ours?"
"Thought you guys wanted nothing to do with me?"
Couldn't lie and say it hadn't hurt the way they had disappeared out of my life. They were my only two friends, and then one day they were gone because of Zane. I shot a glare over my shoulder in his direction, but he didn't seem to catch it as he was too busy smirking and chatting to Ebony.
"Moved on. The question is, have you?" He had asked me one question, but his eyes were asking me another.
He was really asking if I was over whatever it was with Zane.
"Yeah, I have."