Page 9 of Liv and Ripper

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CHAPTER 3

LIV

Sometimes a feeling would suffocate me, a feeling I couldn't explain completely. As if living wasn't meant for me and by that, I meant this type living. Living on drugs, starving myself through exercise, and posing clothes for humans to drool over.

"So, Liv, have you given any more thought to the lingerie line?" Den asked me, lighting up a cigarette that is poison to our body. It has a raw dash of silver to it and would burn the lungs but immediately sending our bodies into healing, which sends dopamine through our body. It was addictive. It was a toxic combination—the feeling mixed with the damage it was doing to our body.

He gestured the cigarette to me, and once again, I was tempted.

I took the cigarette from him, inhaling the silver poison. It swirled through my body, legitimately burning pieces of my lungs, and then my body went into healing mode, making my head spin. My hand went out for the wall.

Fuck.

I didn't expect it to be so hard to take. It wasn’t the pain, it was euphoria that followed. But then the boiling pain overtook the euphoria and it was unbearable.

"Thought you'd like that. It's my own blend." Den's voice whispered in my ear, and never in my life had I tasted real fear till now. Hearing those words sent fucking terror through every blood vessel. I went to do something, anything, but it wasn't like I had a pack connection of a mate. I was in this hotel nightclub, in a corner, and no one was going to hear me scream. Because being the idiot fool I was, I had taken away my ability to defend myself as well.

* * *

Iwas slowly coming to, my body aching, and that wasn’t normal because usually I was full of strength, especially after I had slept. As my mind came to, I did recap of last night. The last thing I remembered was Den, whispering in my ear. My eyes widened and I took in my surroundings. An alleyway. Tears stung my eyes, so terrified, so scared, but the dawning feeling of what happened—memories of the night began to flood back. The ripping of my dress, the force he used. My hand was shaking as I placed my hand on my heart. I couldn’t calm my heart even if I wanted to. How the hell did I let this happen? This was completely my fault. I shouldn’t have worn that dress. I shouldn’t have smoked the silver poison. Pushing myself back up against the brick wall, I tried my hardest not to be overpowered by the thundering of my heart and the ache between my legs.

I leant my head against the wall, staring up at the early morning sky.

All those seductive poses I had done in front of him. Den told me that I had brought on last night, that I had wanted last night to happen. Ironic enough, my dad always said I led men on with my poses, and now I was paying for it.

Talking the tie from around the middle, I ripped the dress completely so it looked like it was meant to be in two pieces. The top half like a short top, and the skirt. I left the tie on the ground. I wouldn’t let this night be the night that broke me.

Walking from the scene with my head held high, I repeated to myself—I wouldn’t let this break me.

* * *

Walking up the driveway of my parents’ small three-bedroom house, I hoped no one was around. I may have made the somewhat dress passable for strangers, but my family would know I would never wear something like this out. Modelling was different than what I wore by choice.

My worst fear was met when I walked into the house. Dad was home, with members. All eyes went off whatever they were looking at on the table, and their eyes locked on me. My dad’s bottom lip started to shake with rage.

“What the fuck you wearing, Liv!” he roared at me, sending tears to my eyes. Did he really think I would leave the house looking like this willingly? I wanted to snap at him. I wanted him to know the truth by one look at me.

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