Page 24 of Ours

It was like all celebrations, until the music ticked slow for the wedding dance. Then suddenly I was fucking nervous. Was never a dancer. I was many things but good on my feet, wasn’t one of them. However when I see Gabriella giggling to the side with the bridesmaids, and the other groomsmen taking my lead. I walked towards her.

She glanced up at the same time, as I decided on this suicide mission. I saw a genuine smile spread across her lips, as I put my hand out and she slipped her hand into mine.

Guiding her to the dancefloor, while everyone stared at me—was fucking getting under my skin. Till I spun her around into my arms, and she looked up, into my eyes. Suddenly didn’t give a fuck if everyone was staring at me or not, all I cared about was my purpose.

My hand stayed on her lower back, didn’t dip any lower, had more respect for her than that.

She was the one to curl into my chest, as the music played. I couldn’t think of a better day than this. I get a reason to hold her close, and she doesn’t push me away—which makes everything better.

“Hudson?” She whispered in my chest and my hand was running across her back.

“Yeah darling?”

“Stay with me tonight?”

And I stilled. Fucking stay with her, she had to know I had control but it was being pushed to it’s limits. I don’t know if I can torment myself with her in arms reach all night again. Then again, what if I finally did it, and made my move?

9

Hudson

Ihad monitored her drinking since she asked me to spend the night with her tonight. Switched her to soda hours ago, she was still giggling, and let me keep a hand on her the whole night. I told myself it was because of her anxiety. But when she looked at me, it reminded me of how she used to look at me.

I had eased back on the drinks myself, since dancing with her—and her words ringing in my ears again. She wanted me to stay with her tonight. I knew that didn’t mean we were having sex, we had spent nights together before tonight, but something about tonight felt different.

The bride and groom had left, and the party was winding down, when I saw Gabriella yawn. I walked back to her and she gave me this knee buckling smile, and I fucking had to remind myself I had to keep standing and not drop to my knees and beg her to wipe our past.

She turned to face me, “Wanna call it a night?” she said that like I wouldn’t walk her to her dorm room, and I nodded my head, putting the full bourbon down, and taking her hand.

“You have a good night?” I asked our hands linked and I brought the back of her hand to my mouth kissing it.

“Yeah I did,”

I glanced up and she’s looking directly at me. Those cider green eyes staring at me. I swallowed sharply, and she made it sound like I was the one to make her have a good night. I shrugged it off, and I felt nervous, so very fucking nervous as we reached her door. I knew I couldn’t do it.

I couldn’t fucking be with her tonight, not when liquor had touched her lips.

She leaned back against her door, this dress just highlighted her every asset even showing the top of her scar.

She’s looking up at me, as I take a step towards her and not away. She’s looking at me, and I swear she is telling me to kiss her.

My eyes dropped to her blush rose red lips.

Fuck I might have read it wrong, but I brought my other hand up, putting it beside her, on the door, and lean down. She’d stop me right?

My heart is racing so hard, and everything in my body is on the fucking edge. I’m nervous, and the type of nerves that came before I made a life altering decision.

I brushed my lips against hers. It was like a heroin addict, getting their first dose of the drug they had been sober from. I can’t stop my hand from going off the door, and my other from unlinking with hers, and I cupped her face, kissing her, as if I’d never get another fucking shot at her.

It’s sweet, I’m kissing her, so she knows that she is my world. I had one soul mate on this earth and she was it. I’d do anything for her, be any type of man she needed If she needed a serial killer, I’d be it. If she needed me to work a nine to five, I’d fucking do everything possible to do it. She wasn’t a woman, she was the woman, since I laid eyes on her at eighteen. I prospected late for the club.

The point was, the day I laid eyes on her, I found the purpose to me breathing. She was the only fucking woman I’d ever consider marrying, and she was and will forever be the woman that could say she got inside Hudson St Jame’s heart. I can honestly say, that no other woman would come close to her. Wouldn’t marry another, or tell another I loved them. Because Gabriella Hart had my heart, my soul and would forever be my fucking purpose.

She wasn’t mine, but I was hers. And I kissed her, so she knew that.

Finally I pulled back, I’m expecting to see regret in her eyes. Only when I looked into her green cider eyes, I see… and I’m fucking taken back by it. I remember that look clearly, it was the same look she gave me when I told her I loved her, it was the same look she gave me when I carried her home, after she broke her ankle. Only this time, it’s tinted with lust but I know that look. It’s fucking… love.

Her hand goes to my cheek and her breathing is shaky as she looked at me.

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