“You’ll be okay.”
He shook his head. Crying.
“You’ll be okay,” I said softer, and smiled. Looking up at him. “I never deserved it, anyway.”
“What... what?” he continued to stutter. “You deserve everything Aurora… just let me fix this.”
I shook my head, crying.
“No, I don’t. I don’t deserve love.” I shrugged, while I just let the tears run down my cheeks, which flowed down my neck. “I guess that’s how it’s meant to be. I really love you, Tyson. But I don’t deserve you to love me back or fight for me.”
I kissed his cheek quickly and took my hand from his heart, even though I felt him reach for me.
I turned, grabbed the stop sign, and walked out the open door. Even when I heard him fall to his knees.
I didn’t turn back.
He will be okay.
And maybe that’s what hurt me the most because I wouldn’t be.
I banged on our family's front door. Why was it locked? Why didn’t I have a key? I banged harder and then the porch lights turned on.
Dad answered it and I pushed in.
“I fuuuccked up.” I managed to get out. Shaking. Terrified. I couldn’t fucking see through the tears.
“I fuc… I fuck… I fucked up.”
Dad grabbed my shoulders.
“Tyson’s what’s wrong?” He demanded.
“Kade? What is going on?” Mom sounded half asleep.
I blinked, and the tears ran down my cheeks and I could see.
“I hurt her. Nah. I fucking destroyed her.” I couldn’t stop shaking and more fucking tears. “I broke her.” I coughed out through tears.
I felt like I was going to pass out.
Dad gripped me, pulling me to his chest.
“It’s okay son.”
“Nah. She’s gone… she…she… she ain’t gonna be okay.”
Dad held me up. As I fucking shook with tears.
I tried to breathe but I couldn’t.
“I..”
“Tyson. You need to breathe.” Mom was at my side. And had a hand on my back. “It’s okay sweetheart. Now just take a deep breath baby. Come on, you can do it.”
“I…”
I weakly pushed myself from dad.