Page 38 of Going for Three

I handed my card to the bartender then reached for my phone again. Bree shoved her big titties in my face instead. I didn’t mean to lick my lips when her sweet fragrance wrapped around me, but I did.

“You miss this, don’t you? You’re not the family man type, Kianis. You love your freedom way too much.Tuh!Missing out on the opportunity to fuck bad bitches? Yeah, you’re not going to do it.” She reached for my dick and began to stroke it through mysweats. “Stay… Let’s hash it out. I’ll even let you take your anger and frustration out on this pussy.”

Bree’s voice joined my fathers in a choir that increased my feelings of doubt and uncertainty. I didn’t want their words to hold any truth, but I had to be honest with myself because the facts were always in the media. I was not known for being a monogamous man. Could I really commit to being everything Charm and our son needed for a lifetime?

Bree squeezing my dick again returned me to the present. I glanced down at her in disgust. The bitch couldn’t even get my dick hard. Without warning, I lifted my hands to her chest and pushed with all the might in me. She stumbled backward in her heels before falling flat on her ass.

I pointed at her with a death glare. “Let that be the last fucking time you touch or mumble a fucking word to me. Consider me dead for all I care but we have nothing to talk about. I love Charm. She is my wife. When you see me or her from this day forward, you turn and look the other way, or I promise to God I’ma get you fucked up. An ass whupping is long overdue.”

She began to cry but her tears didn’t move me. I had no sympathy for Breeland. She was lucky I didn’t do worse.

The bartender stood there wide eyed along with anyone else in the bar. I snatched my card from his hand, tucked it in my wallet, grabbed my phone off the bar, and walked away. I thought walking outside and inhaling a lung full of fresh air would help but it didn’t. The doubt was still there nibbling away at every seed of hope buried in my chest.

I glanced down at my phone seeing another picture of Charm populate before my eyes. God… my girl was so fucking beautiful and perfect. She deserved the fucking world and every inch of land on this muthafucka. The oceans, lakes, mountains, stars,and whatever the fuck else you could think of too. But could I really be the man to give her that?

The fact that I felt emptiness every time I asked myself this question made me feel like deep down I knew the answer was no. Charm and my son deserved more than I was capable of providing. It was only a matter of time before I fucked up.

Since I was already downtown, I pocketed my phone and found myself walking until I was in front of a hotel. Checking into a room for the night was a blur. I was crashing on the couch after a quick stop at the bar. The glass of cognac I’d poured tipped over the side of the glass from my clumsiness. I paid it no mind.

Taking my phone from my pocket, I stared at my phone screen. The voices in my head grew louder. My desire to be close to Charm increased in intensity. Before I knew it, I had the Instagram app open and I was making a carousel post that included all of my favorite photos from the maternity photoshoot.

@mrmostlikelytowin: I know they don’t believe in our love but I can’t wait to prove them wrong. If I was going to start a family with anyone it would be you. I don’t give a fuck what anyone says I’m going to give y’all every part of me. It’s us until this muathfucka crashes and burns. This ain’t my girlfriend or my baby mama, this is my fucking wife. Put some respect on my girl name from this day forward. I’ll do a life sentence for this one.

Satisfied with everything I had to say, I uploaded the post then dropped my phone in my lap. The liquor was on my ass, and before I knew it, I was falling asleep staring at Charm’s picture. A part of me was still afraid I couldn’t be who she needed me to be but the part of me that loved her was willing to try. To give it everything I had. Charm wasn’t just my girlfriend. She was mywife. I decided to make that move, and now it was time to man up and face my demons.

I wokeup some time during the middle of the night missing Kinga’s breath softly falling over my face. I expected to smell the liquor seeping through his pores from a night of binging on liquor. Instead I woke up in the bed alone with his son pressing on my bladder. As I got up, my heart tightened as the weight of empathy swallowed me up. I watched the game from home, so I saw that things didn’t go so well for Kinga. I waited up for him as long as I could. I was concerned knowing he hadn’t found his way to our bed safely.

Moving at a slow pace, I kicked my legs over the side of the bed and slid my feet into my house shoes. I wobbled to the bathroom, rubbing my belly gently. After handling my businessand washing my hands, I thought to check the front room for Kinga.

Reaching for the remote, I turned the TV on for some light. I flipped through Hulu then Netflix looking for something to watch. I finally settled on some Viking show that looked intriguing enough. I lived for the blood, violence, and gore of those reenactments of that time in history. Those people were ruthless as hell. Sometimes, I found myself watching through the spaces in my fingers as they covered my eyes.

I tossed the remote on the bed and shuffled through my condo flipping on lights as I went. I sighed when I found the living room as empty as I had left it. I turned to go back to the room but the craving for something sweet became too intense to ignore. I allowed my bulging belly to lead me to the kitchen. I swear I grew a little more every time I shut my eyes.

After snatching the door to the freezer open, I dug around until I found a treat I wanted. My latest pregnancy craving was frozen fruit bars, and Kinga had stuffed the inside with every flavor in stores. I chose a strawberry bar then grabbed a bottle of water from the pantry. I preferred room temperature water, so it was perfect. I popped it open for a swig then walked back to the room.

I got back comfortable beneath the sheets. Peeling open the package of my ice cream, I started to enjoy the sugary sweetness of the strawberry flavors bursting across my tongue. I wiggled my toes, feeling satisfied with my life.

Turning the show back on, I reached for my phone to see if there was anything from my husband. I tried not to worry as I placed a call that I already knew would go to voicemail. After I hung up, I got ready to text him when I realized my notifications were flooded from every social media app there was.

I braced myself when I saw that all the tags were coming from one of the well-known gossip blogsI Heard Media. I rolledmy eyes figuring it would be another pregnancy speculation, except it was confirmation.

My mouth fell open, eyes filled with tears, and heart raced as I read Kinga’s post. There were so many typos that it was obvious his ass was drunk, but the message was still evident. He’d revealed it all for the world to see in a heartfelt message then didn’t come home. Tears splattered on the phone screen before I pressed it into my chest.

Releasing a shaky breath, I tried to settle the anger rising in my chest. I couldn’t believe Kinga had gone against my wishes and told the whole world about not only us but our baby. The temperature in my body continued to rise until I was dialing him again. This time I was sure to leave a voicemail.

“Kianis Kinga, how fucking dare you share our maternity photos like that! I could strangle your neck right now. Then you had the nerve not to bring your ass home? I know you had a rough game but we’re a team and I’m not your pregnant side chick. I am your pregnantwife! I could need you at any moment and you decided to pour your heart out while creating distance with us. You better be lucky I liked the photos you posted or that’d be your ass. Come home or call me back so I know you’re okay.”

I tapped my phone against my palm before automatically going back to Kinga’s post. I sat on the edge of the bed reading it over and over until the comments at the bottom caught my attention.

@reignofall:Once a dog, always a dog. Don’t trust him Charm

@whatupho:So fucking cute together. I’m here for it!

@rastapasta88:King of the Court, a married man? Going to be somebody’s daddy? Get the headlines ready! He about to live in the blogs just like his damn no good daddy.

@alittlemessy:Runnnnn Charm. I thought you was smart! This is all too fast. Slow down mamas.

@stantheman:Kinga you ain’t wrong my boy. I’d lock that down too.

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