Page 121 of Ruin Me Gently

“It’s not fair,” Her voice was barely above a whisper, but it still landed like a blade, slicing through my ribs. “You take care of me. You touch me like I’m glass. You—” she stopped short, words tangling in the fragile space between us. “You’ve seen me bare. Had parts of me I didn’t think I’d give to someone. And I don’t even get to see your face? Or know your name? How’s that fair?”

“I know.”

Silence stretched between us, thick and heavy before she spoke again, softer this time. “I don’t want it to be like this.”

She shifted against me, the steady rhythm of her breath seeping into my ribs. “This is fun, but…”

She trailed off, but I knew what she meant.

I stayedstill, letting her weight sink into me, letting her words carve into my flesh and bone.

She was right.

But I couldn’t. I couldn’t give her that. I couldn’t show her me. No matter how much I wanted to.

“I’m sorry.” My voice was quiet, but there was no mistaking the lead behind it.

She sighed, something like acceptance curling at the edges of disappointment. She didn’t pull away—but she didn’t cling to me either.

Instead, she just lay there, quiet, her fingers idly tracing shapes against my stomach, but there was a distance now.

A slow, crushing pressure worked its way into my chest.

I’d done this. I was the one keeping her at arm’s length, the one who refused to give her what she wanted. The one who stupidly thought that what I was giving her was enough.

But it wasn’t enough.

I’d made this decision.

And now, I was watching the realisation settle into her bones as the truth unfolded.

This was a goodbye in disguise.

I understood. I did. I wasn’t making her happy. I was hurting her, keeping her trapped in something that could never be what she deserved.

I didn’t want to let her go.

Fuck,Ireallydidn’t want to let her go.

But this was better.

This was how it should be.

I could go back to keeping her safe from a distance. Watching, protecting, making sure nothing touched her.

She wouldn’t have to carry the weight of me.

She could live her life without the damage I would inevitably bring.

I could look after her without ever subjecting her to pain.

That would be enough.

It had to be.

CHAPTER TWENTY NINE

It’d been fun. Exciting.A full-on forbidden thrill.

---