Page 186 of Ruin Me Gently

Maybe it should’ve. Maybe I should’ve been mad. But… shit.

How had I not put two and two together? How had I not realised that everything had started right after that night?

I inhaled sharply, shaking my head. “You’ve got to be kidding me. This whole time? All of this, everything—it all started that night? You were keeping me safe fromhim?”

His throat bobbed. “At first.”

“And then?”

“And then I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

This fucking man, I swear to God. My breath stuck somewhere between my bones. I stared at him, at the way his mouth pressed into a tight line, like he was bracing for impact.

“No,” I said, glaring into him.

His eyes widened.

“No more of that look,” I said, shaking my head. “That guilty, shameful look like you’ve done something wrong. You haven’t. You—” my heart was aching so bad. “Thank you, you big stupid behemoth of a man.”

His lips parted slightly, breath hitching.

I squeezed his fingers. “For that night. For everything since. For being patient. For making me feel safe when I didn’t know how to ask for it. For showing up, time and time again. For holding me like I’m breakable, but never making me feel weak. For every little thing you somehow managed to notice. Still do. Every second of it means more than I’ll ever be able to say.”

His whole body tensed. He looked like he wanted to say something, like he had a million things trapped beneath his teeth.

“You were gonna get hit by an e-bike,” he blurted.

I blinked. “Excuse me?”

“It was an e-bike. It was gonna hit you.”

“What the hell are you on—oh.You’re joking, right?”

“I’m not.”

I clapped a hand over my mouth, but it was no use. The laugh ripped out of me, feral and uncontrollable.

“You could’ve gotten hurt,” he said.

“No, I could’ve become a damn meme. You saved me from an e-bike, if that isn’t one of the most—”

I didn’t get to finish. His hands were gripping my face. Mouth crashing onto mine.

“Per l’amor di Dio, Lilith,” he muttered, pulling back for a second. “Stai zitta per una volta.”

His lips were on mine again, stealing the breath from my lungs.

“I don’t know what that means,” I said between hurried kisses.

“It means just kiss me.”

I sighed into his mouth, fingers slipping beneath his sweater, nails scratching along his stomach. His breath hitched, whole body tensing.

Yep. More of that, please.

I trailed my hands up his chest, feeling every dip, every hard plane, every shuddered inhale he took as I mapped him out. I slid my hands lower. His hips shifted. I pressed my palm against his cock through his pants, feeling the hard, thick length of him.

“Lilith.” His exhale was sharp as his forehead dropped to mine, his dark eyes hazy with want.

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