Page 195 of Ruin Me Gently

“No.”

He stopped walking. “No?”

“I need to get back to Lilith.”

He groaned, tipping his head back. “Come on, dude. We’re so close. He was right there—we have an actual lead. This is the best shot we’ve had at catching him.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

He was right.

This could be something. This might be the break I needed. The final lead, the last piece of the puzzle that’d put an end to all of this.

I clenched my jaw, fingers twitching restlessly at my sides. Lilith would be fine. Just for a little longer. She’d be fine.

She’d be fine.

CHAPTER FORTY FIVE

Isat on thefloor, back hunched, arms draped over my knees, fingers locked in a white-knuckled grip. My breath came too fast, too shallow, scorching my lungs.

In for four. Hold for four. Out for four.

In for four. Hold for four. Out for four.

In for four. Hold for four. Out for four.

The elevator doors slid open with a quiet chime.

Silas stepped out, his attention locking onto me straight away. “Lilith?”

Finn followed, taking one look at me before letting out a low whistle. “You look like you just crawled out of the underworld.”

I didn’t react. Couldn’t.

Silas did.

“Shut the fuck up, Finn.”

I must have looked ridiculous. Sat there, curled in, breathing too fast, hair a mess from pulling at it.

Finn’s voice lowered. “Oh, shit. Should I—?”

“Go,” Silas snapped.

He hesitated for a second, his mouth parting like he wanted to say something, but he nodded once and stepped back toward the elevator, leaving us alone.

Silas stepped forward, slow and careful. “What happened, sweetheart?”

He crouched beside me, and I flinched. Hard.

He stilled instantly, hands flexing at his sides, jaw clenching. “Lilith. Breathe.”

I shook my head. I couldn’t. I was drowning in it, my own thoughts spiralling so fast they felt like a noose, tightening, constricting, suffocating—

“Okay,” he soothed. “Let’s do what Dr. Hayes said. Hold your locket, and breathe through it, sweetheart. You’ve got this.”

I shook my head harder, squeezing my eyes shut. “I can’t.”

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