Page 20 of Ruin Me Gently

“You’ve been off, man. You’ve hardly been in the office, you’re zoning out…” He leaned against the doorway, arms crossed like he was settling in for the long haul. “What’s going on?”

I shook my head, straightening in my seat, forcing my shoulders back as I reached for my phone out of habit.

“Nothing,” I said carefully. “Just tired.”

“Bullshit.”

I sighed and stood, shoving back from the table with enough force to make the chair scrape across the floor. “I said it’s nothing. Drop it.”

He didn’t budge. Didn’t blink. But he tilted his head slightly. “Whatever it is. You can talk to me, you know.”

“Don’t need to talk about anything,” I muttered.

“I know it’s that time of year again.”

“What do you mean it’s that time of year—”

Oh.

Nope. Not doing this right now.

“I said,drop it.”He didn’t deserve the sharpness that came out of me, but he didn’t flinch.

Truth be told, I hadn’t even realised itwasthat time of year.

But his assumption made sense.

No matter how good I was at compartmentalising or keeping things buried, some things had a way of creeping back in, settling into the quiet, slipping through the cracks.

It was permanent, a scar carved into my chest where no one could see.

It was the reason why I’d keep my distance from Lilith, just helping from the shadows. Making sure she was safe and happy, but withoutactuallygetting involved in her life.

Because being close to me came with a price, and I wasn’t about to let her pay it.

“Silas, dude. You know it wasn’t—”

“Cristo, chiudi quella cazzo!”I snapped, turning on my heel. I strode toward my office, practically vibrating as the tension coiled tighter in my chest.

I grabbed my hoodie off the chair and yanked it on. Next came the coat, then the scarf, fingers moving fast, twisting it halfway up my face like I was trying to reconstruct my emotional barrier with clothes.

The city pulsed around me. Cabs honking, the distant hum of conversations, the faint rattle of a subway somewhere below.

The second I stepped onto the sidewalk, something brushed against me. Not a hard hit, but enough to knock me off balance for half a step.

“Sorry,” a voice murmured, quick and quiet.

I glanced down automatically and did a double take so hard I almost rearranged my spine.

Lilith?

She didn’t look up, just kept moving, head tilted downward, earbuds in place, a paper bag of food clutched tightly in her hands.

What the fuck?

It wasn’t just that she’d walked right into me without so much as a glance. It was the fact that she washolding lunch.

I’d just sent her and Molly lunch to the store. A good lunch. So, why the hell was she out here carrying food like I hadn’t taken care of that?

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