Page 78 of Duty and Desire

“I may have been that in the beginning.” His expression grew rueful. “It might surprise you to learn what changed my view of you.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Please, tell me.”

Franz’s smile softened his features. “I watched you fall in love.” He reached into his pocket and removed his phone. My breathing hitched, and he winced. “No, I can’t let you call Gio. That wouldn’t be fair, on either of you. I meant what I said. A clean break was the only way to end it. But thereissomeone who’s been trying to contact you.”

I broke into a smile. “Claudia.” I could really do with a dose of her right then.

He chuckled. “Who else?”

“What time is it where she is?” Asking my brain to compute that when it had so much else cluttering it up… It wasn’t going to happen.

“They’re about six hours behind us.” He didn’t hand me his phone, however. “I’ll be standing outside while you talk to her, but you must promise me?—”

My leaden heart sank. “I won’t call him. Besides, I wouldn’t know what to say to him.” And I was too scared of how he’d react.

Franz studied me for a moment, then gave a nod. He tapped the screen and put the phone to his ear. “Hey. I’ve got someone here you might want to talk to.”

I couldn’t miss Claudia’s shriek.

Franz gave me the phone before heading out the door.

As soon as it closed, I hit Speaker. “Where are you?”

“In the US. Nick—I can still call you that, right?”

“If you call me anything else, I’m hanging up.”

She laughed. “Thank God.” There was a pause. “I’m so sorry to hear about your father and brother.”

“Thank you.” What had shocked me were my feelings of grief. I hadn’t expected to feel such depth of emotion at their passing. All the way home—twenty hours from Tahiti in a jet—hot tears had pricked my eyes, and those moments still persisted.

Except grief then had given way to guilt. The times I’d ignored letters, phone calls, not that there had been many of those…The state occasions I’d missed, not wanting to be anywhere near my family.

And now it was too late.

“Franz told me, by the way. How you left the island.”

I heard the unspoken rebuke.

How you didn’t tell Gio what had happened.

“Did he also tell you how he escorted me onto a boat with less than five minutes’ warning? How he confiscated my phone?” Before she could come back with a response, I let out a heavy sigh. “None of that matters anymore. It’s over. And as far as Karoline is concerned, it never happened.” I caught the hitch in her breathing. “Yes, Karoline.My soon-to-be-wife, remember? My Royal Attaché is already talking about a ball next month, to celebrate the upcoming marriage, my accession…After the funeral, of course. Before would be tacky, don’t you think?”

Silence fell, and I regretted my bitter words.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Nick… You… you can’t go ahead with this.” She sounded aghast.

“It isn’t as though I have much option. I’m the last of the royal line. There’s the next generation to think of. And with that in mind, the last thing I want finding its way to her ears is my affair with a man. No one can know about Gio, do you understand? No one.”

My life is not my own anymore. I’m going to be thrust into the spotlight, and whatever happened on Bora-Bora will have to remain in the shadows.

“Nick, please. You can’t live a lie. It will tear you apart. And it will tear your marriage apart too. Just think for a minute, okay? Think about what you’re saying. You’regay, sweetheart. As gay as a three-dollar bill. So what are you going to do? Fake it? For the rest of your life?”

I raised my eyes to the ceiling. “And what options do I have?” The words came out more forcefully than I’d intended. “If this is how every conversation is going to go before I get to the altar, then maybe it would be best if you didn’t call me again.” I ignored her sharp intake of breath. “I’m sure your would-be boyfriend will keep you up-to-date on current affairs. Have a good life, Claudia. Thank you for being a friend.”

I hung up, shaking like a leaf.

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