Page 106 of Gates of Tartarus

“Sir, yes sir!” Walker snaps back mockingly, and the two glare at each other. “What do you want Reed to do? You want us to bring in people to read until her brain collapses? Want us to caffeinate her so she can work ‘til she’s bleeding from her eyes again? What’s your plan,boss?”

“That’s unfair, Walker,” Smith says under his breath.

“Fuck.You,” Walker replies tightly, then walks away.

???

Everyone leaves to their various tasks, with heavy, backward glances, but I’m too tired and too empty to even begin to interpret their stupid fucking emotions. It’s like sandpaper in my throat every time I breathe, and I can feel my pulse, every movement a dance with Death’s scythe. The only thing keeping me sane in any way is Gemma’s exhausted, grey shield covering me in gossamer-thin protection. She’s sitting silently by my bedside, barely moving, face and knuckles white with focus. Using everything in me, I try to pull my hand away from hers, but her fingers follow mine, gripping them tightly, and she shakes her head sadly.

“I’m too tired, Kailani. This is the only way.” Fatigue makes her voice thick and slurred, and I force my eyes to focus on her face. I barely recognize her in this moment, the familiar features replaced by someone new.

“Whoareyou?” I whisper, a funeral in my words. “Whoare you?”

Gemma sighs and straightens, speaking softly, but confidently, like she has planned how to say this for a long time, relief naked on her face.

“When I was 18, just after I graduated high school, my parents kicked me out.”

I nod impatiently. I know all this, have heard it all before. Gemma holds up a hand placatingly.

“It all goes together, Kailani. The truth and… and the rest. Just... let me speak please.”

I motion mockingly for her to continue, and she winces slightly.

“I had been in all advanced classes and spoke three languages – English obviously, French, and Arabic.” My brows raise slightly in surprise. She has never told me that. “I applied for a job at the local PD since we lived on the border and they were always looking for people to translate documents for them. I took a few reading and writing tests, interviewed, and began working there almost immediately. I thought I’d be doing low-level stuff, like translating court documents and shit.” She looks at me to see if I am still listening, and I shrug slightly. While the language thing was surprising, the rest of it held true with what she had told me in the past. She got kicked out after high school for not toeing the Doll line and had gotten a low-level job at the local PD as a secretary. Gemma sees something in my face that causes her to sigh and keeps on with her story.

“Ididdo low-level translation for a while – a few months or so. But then there was a situation right at the border crossing. Some guy was high and acting crazy, threatening the guards, strapped to the teeth with weapons. One patrolman was already down, bleeding out at the guy’s feet, and he had a second one kneeling in front of him with a gun in his mouth. No one there spoke Arabic, only French and English, so I got bumped up from glorified secretary to conflict negotiator. When I got there... there was just so much blood. The guy was a full-out lunatic, and no one could risk shooting him with the number of civilians around. He wasrightin the middle of a group of cars, and every time someone tried to open a door, he’d put a bullet in it. There was this kid in one of the cars shaking so bad. She wasn’t making a sound, but she was shaking and tears were pouring down her face. Two little pigtails, a Minnie Mouse bow...” I can tell the memory is hitting her hard.

“I called out to the guy in Arabic as soon as I got there, trying to calm him down or make a connection. I wasn’t trained in anything, and was young as hell, but I figured I’d try. He screamed at me about the sky being on fire or something, and his eyes were so crazy you could see white all around them. The only thing I could think to do was this thing I’d been able to do since I was a kid... Kind of throw a proverbial blanket over his emotions and muffle them.”

I make a sound, and she laughs at me in a tired sort of way. “I’ll tell you about that some other time. It’s a different part of the story, Kai...lani. Anyway, I kept speaking to him in Arabic as I numbed him out, hoping people would think that whatever I was saying was working. He dropped his gun as I was talking to him, and someone was able to put a bullet through his forehead. And… uh... yeah. Everything was a mess. Most of the guys were really impressed with me, and congratulated me, and then I was kind of left alone during the cleanup. The cars weren’t allowed to move until everything was taken care of, and that poor kid was still crying so hard... I figured no one was really watching me, so I moved over to her car, and just kind of hung out there, numbing her, until she fell asleep. And as I started to walk away, this old woman who was at the Border Crossing station called me over.”

“Gomez,” I breathe out softly.

Gemma nods. “Gomez,” she confirms. “She had seen the whole thing, and I don’t know how she knew. I really don’t. I’ve been over it in my head a hundred times. But somehow she knew. And she offered me a job with CDS. I’d never heard of it before, and it definitely sounded like a crazy-like, conspiracy-theory thing or something, but the salary was good, and it got me away from my hometown, so I accepted. I moved…”

“To Seattle?” I interrupt.

She grimaces again. “To New York.”

“What? You lived in New York? For how long? Jesus, Gemma.”

“I know. Iknow. I’m sorry, Kaikai. Honestly I am. But please, just hear me out, okay? So I moved to New York for a bit. Gomez kept me with her all the time, called me her Mute. Most people thought it was because I didn’t talk at all, but it was because I’d mute their emotions in high-tension meetings to help things move to a resolution faster. Once she started the Stargate Initiative Program, she decided I’d be more useful in the field, looking for potential recruits.” Gemma looks up at me with large, slightly fearful eyes and swallows audibly. “Um. Yeah. So she partnered me with a CDS officer who had just started working for her. His… He... It was Hideo.”

My stomach drops out, and I feel like I am about to throw up. Everything is falling into place, piece by terrible fucking piece.

Whatever my face looks like makes Gemma’s eyes fill with tears, and she continues softly. “So Hideo and I worked together for a while in New York, looking for possible Psychs for CDS recruitment. We… uh... we were pretty good at it, actually. Good enough that when Gomez was tasked to open three more trial programs across the US we helped her train the new Hunters, before we ended up in Seattle. There were several possible Bleeders in the area, and it seemed like an easy place to recruit.”

Gemma stares down at the table, and I have a feeling that worse things are coming than have already passed before. She clears her throat a couple of times before pushing through. “So we recruited a Pleasure Bleeder named Dustin. He was a real piece of work. Only came to the initial interview because he was positive it would get him full access to my pants.”

Even in the midst of the awfulness, I snort. Dustin thinking he had any chance with Gemma was astounding.

“I may have... led him on slightly, in order to get him to the initial interview. Once he signed, I made it incredibly clear that our relationship was solely professional. He was pissed off and started talking loudly about his conquests any time he was around me. Well, one day he was talking about this…” her face blanches slightly, and she grits her teeth before continuing. “This kind of awkward, desperate loser. I mean,fucking hotloser. He definitely recognized your hotness. But also your vulnerability.”

Ohhhhhhhh fuuuuck. I’m the awkward, desperate loser? Fuck my life. DUSTIN thought I was a loser?I moan quietly, putting my face in my hands.

“I know, I know!” she continues hurriedly. “And for some reason, that day, he just pissed me offso much. So I decided I’d go warn the girl before he could fuck her up. He had mentioned that she worked at a diner…”

“And you found me,” I state flatly.

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