Page 67 of The Women at Ocean's End

‘And, Ros,’ Mai said softly. ‘People are going to be especially pleased that you’re not leaving after all.’

‘I guess I have to be pretty happy about that too.’ And she caught Heather’s eye. She looked as if she might burst with happiness for her.

It was a nice feeling to knock on Constance’s bedroom door and know that she had good news to tell her at last.

‘Ah, Ros, you’re here.’ Constance tried to sit up in the bed a little.

‘Don’t move on my account,’ Ros said, pulling in a chair. ‘Heather’s making coffee, do you fancy some?’

‘No, no, I don’t think I could face anything at the moment.’ Constance smiled.

‘How do you feel? Any better?’

‘Oh yes, miles better, I think I might go dancing later.’ At least her sense of humour was still intact, but she sounded feeble. Ros thought her heart would break at any moment.

‘We might all go dancing tonight…’ She smiled at Constance. ‘It looks like I’m staying on the island…’

‘Oh, you got the job? With the goats? Oh, Ros…’ And Constance’s face lit up with a strange joyfulness that made Ros think,this is how she must have looked as a girl. She was truly beautiful and then, a huge tear ran down the old lady’s cheek. ‘Oh, don’t mind me, I’m so happy for you…’

‘Constance,’ she reached out, stroked her arm, ‘you mean so much to us, to me and Heather.’ Ros felt a huge ball of emotion at the back of her throat. ‘You know, I don’t remember mygrandparents, but since I’ve been here, I’ve come to think of you as…’ Her voice was breaking, she couldn’t help it. ‘Well, you know, you mean a lot to me and I needed you to know that before…’

‘Are you leaving after all?’ Constance was making fun of her. But then, she turned her face towards the window for a moment and closed her eyes gently. ‘Dear, dear, Ros. You know, if I’d had a daughter or a granddaughter, I’d have wanted her to be like you. I can’t imagine any granny on the island having their hearts as full of love for a child as I have felt for you these last few months.’

‘Oh, Constance.’ And that was it, the floodgates were about to open, but Ros took a deep breath, she would not cry, she would not upset them both now.

‘So, since neither of us are going anywhere just yet,’ Constance sighed, took a long ragged breath, ‘I have things I need to organise, I can’t leave without doing those first.’

‘What sort of things?’

‘I…’ she looked at Ros, ‘don’t laugh, but I need to get my affairs in order and I need to… I need to wipe clean a slate that’s been dirty for far too many years.’

‘Okay, well, can I help you do those things…’

‘Oh, if only,’ she sighed now.

‘By your affairs, do you mean your will?’

‘I suppose.’

‘I could ask Surfer Dude, you know…’

‘What – now which of us is going barmy?’

‘You’re not going barmy and neither am I. You know, Surfer Dude – Jake – he’s a solicitor with some big practice in the city, he takes a few months off every summer to surf and run the coffee shack on the beach.’

‘I never knew that.’

‘Ah, there you go, it takes a blow-in to know these things.’ Ros smiled at Constance.

‘Okay, will you ask him to call up here to me, today, sometime, if he can?’

‘Of course. You know, Constance, I’d do anything for you.’ She wiped a tear from her eye and leaned across and kissed her on her head.

44

Constance

Somehow, time had drifted from Constance. Now, burned-yellow sun fell through the windows and the ceiling took on a coral hue with occasional silver flashes reflected from the water in the distance. She longed to walk to the window, stand there for a while as she’d done so many times before, but she hardly had the energy to lift her head from the pillow. Each time she turned it felt as if she was rolling over a huge old vessel that had seen the last of its days at sea. She’d woken during the night, convinced that she could feel her body slowing down to a deliberate grinding halt. She had opened her eyes and standing there, at the foot of her bed, were Dotty and her mother, smiling at her. At their side, darling Oisin; she reached out to hold his hand, but he just stood there, smiling shyly at her, and she longed to go and stand next to them.

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