Page 42 of Sinful Restraint

My throat was sore as hell.

And yet, once he was finished with me, I was grinning like a Cheshire cat, unaware of what was up. Where was down. And how I would ever be able to walk again.

As Storm and Titan were cleaning me up, Cruz grabbed my mouth and kissed me hard, all tongue and teeth—everything about it was messy as hell, just like it always was with us.

I thought we were still in the scene, but suddenly, his eyes softened and the vulnerable man who had snuck into my room so many hours or days ago—hell if I knew—was gazing at me with so much affection that I whimpered.

“I love you, Ri,” he whispered into my ear, causing me to shiver. “I love you so damn much.”

“I love you, too, Cruz,” I told him, getting choked up at the admission, but meaning it with every part of my soul.

Cruz eventually untied me and carried me back to his bed, his eyes full of love and admiration the entire time. We all fucked another round until I passed out, each of us learning how we worked in a unit with each experience.

I had no idea what time it was, but it felt like at least two days had passed since the gym shootout. The air in Cruz’s bedroom was thick with the scent of sweat and sin as I lay tangled in the aftermath, my limbs too heavy to move, and my breath still uneven. My skin hummed with the memory of their dicks, hands, lips, and tongues all over my body in ways I had never been touched before.

Turning my head, I slowly caught the rise and fall of their chests, in disbelief that I never knew sex like this could exist. Cruz was on one side of me in bed, his arms draped around my stomach, looking so much at peace it moved me to tears.

Storm was on the other side, his hands on my thighs as he slept with a smirk that made me wonder what he was thinking. And Titan was on Cruz’s sofa, and it was pretty adorable to see his tall ass using a plant as a footrest, while the leaves of another one acted like a flat ass pillow.

Wow … I fucked all three of them.And somehow, I felt claimed, not broken. Like the Santari I once was had beenunraveled only to be rewritten into a more whole version of myself now that I had agreed to go into the unknown with them. I hadn’t known surrender could feel like power. Didn’t know I could crave being undone by men who worshiped my body and demanded that I give them more than I thought possible.

I wasn’t naïve though. Our future was uncertain, and I had no idea what was coming next. But one thing I knew for sure was that in some capacity, they belonged in my life … and I belonged in theirs.

chapter fifteen

The bass echoingthroughout Club Havana was relentless, pounding like Cuban conga drums through concrete just like my patrons liked it. I rubbed the heel of my hand against my temple in frustration after a day of putting out one fire after the next.

“Everything good?” I asked Mekhi and Tony when they entered through the back entrance of the club after making sure the gym was secure since construction just started to rebuild the property.

“We’re good,” Mekhi stated, while Tony just nodded, his usual joking banter non-existent. The loss of Phil was affectinga lot of my men, but Tony most of all. The two had been friends since they were kids, and I knew all too well the loss he was feeling.

“If you need some time off, take it,” I told Tony, clasping him on the shoulder. “We can handle shit until you’re good.”

Tony shook his head. “Nah. I’m fine, Boss.”

Mekhi and I shared a look of concern, but didn’t push him on it. Honestly, if it hadn’t been for Santari, the gym shootout four days ago would still have my mind all kinds of fucked up.

Unfortunately, work didn’t stop when people died around me. I had to keep a constant pulse on the Miami streets to let my enemies know that my business was still running smoothly, which it was. Even so, losing Phil hurt like hell, especially when I was still grieving the loss of Rev.

When my phone dinged, I cussed when I read the message from Elijah.

I told Poppy you weren’t accepting visitors today when she showed up at your office, but she refuses to leave. Shall I escort her to the Velvet Room?

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I huffed, shooting Elijah a text that I’d be to the Velvet Room in ten minutes. No one went into my office without permission.

I had broken things off with Poppy and my other subs the day after I completed that job for Sinceer. Poppy had been understanding, already assuming Santari had been the reason. It wasn’t that Poppy couldn’t enjoy the amenities of the club, but I guess she’d been putting on a front if she was here tonight demanding to see me.

“What do you need?” Mekhi asked.

“Nothing cuz. I’ll handle this.”

I wrapped things up with Mekhi and Tony, then made my way to the Velvet Room, prepared for another round of bullshit.

Elijah caught my eye when I reached the kink level, weaving between naughty regulars and the hopeful vultures circling them ready for a good time.

“Is she in there?” I asked, pointing to the closed door.

Elijah leaned in with a sly smirk. “Yes, sir. She is.”