Page 20 of Turret

“How have you been doing that?”

He sighed. “Nothing that’s worked. I’ve mostly been trying to find ways of testing its limits in an attempt to breach the magical barrier, as well as investigating areas where the tower has recently changed to see if I can uncover anything useful. If only the tower contained books on magic and curses, but my investigations have turned up nothing.”

“Have you managed to discover anything?” I pushed the plate of sliced bread towards him to encourage him to eat, and after a moment’s hesitation during which he ensured I had enough on my own plate for a full meal, he reluctantly accepted it.

“Nothing useful, I’m afraid, though I have reason to hope I’m making progress on the matter I was studying the day the tower trapped you in the library.” He lifted his bread to his mouth but stopped at my puzzled frown. “Is something wrong?”

“You usually take your bread with butter.”

He blinked down at the tray, searching. “But there isn’t any—” His words faltered when I scooted the butter closer. For a moment he stared at it with a rather struggling look.

“What’s the matter?” I asked.

He hastily blinked and tore his gaze away with a rather frustrated sigh. “Nothing.” He took a bite of bread without bothering to butter it, only pausing mid-chew at my confused pucker. “Butter is now limited, so I shall go without.”

He took another bite, appearing entirely calm…even as he avoided my eyes. Though his explanation made sense considering his usual tendency towards self-sacrifice, his words left me with an uneasy feeling that his excuse hadn’t been the real reason he hadn’t buttered his bread. But what other explanation could there possibly be?

I was distracted from my worries by Quinn nervously clearing his throat and looked up to find his gaze not on me but taking in the circular room. “There’s something I wish to discuss with you.”

Apprehension prickled my heart. By his solemn expression, this would likely be a difficult conversation. “What is it?”

“The magic is slowly fading. I’m not sure which part of Her Majesty’s enchantment still exists, but the tower losing its ability to create our food gives me cause to wonder which of its magic will fade next…and whether it’ll be its protective spells. I fear that soon it’ll no longer be safe to remain in this tower. I think we should find a way to leave.”

He said the last part in a rush, as if to get the words out before he lost his nerve. I pursed my lips in silent disapproval for his choice in topic, but it wasn’t enough to prevent him from hastily continuing.

“My investigation of the tower has led me to believe there may be a way to breach its magic. If we could find it, we could finally leave and return home.”

The anxiety I’d come into this room to escape—an emotion I always felt whenever I considered leaving the tower—flared. How could I ever leave? The outside world was filled with too many unknowns, and I’d already dealt with enough of those to last a lifetime: the uncertainty that accompanied my frequent and unexplained illnesses, my unknown future, my role as a princess…and now the shifting relationship with my guard. How could I possibly face another?

I sighed. “I know you mean well, but in truth, I don’t want to leave, Quinn.”

He seemed unsurprised by this answer, for it was one I gave him often. “Don’t you ever wonder what lies beyond? There’s so much more than this, Gemma. I wish you’d believe it.”

For a moment I tentatively allowed myself to imagine answers to the mysteries of the world beyond these walls, only this time I wasn’t alone in my daydreams, but with Quinn. My cheeks warmed, but I didn’t shy away from the pleasant image of us together. If he could remain with me, would I ever consider…

I gave my head a rigid shake to dispel the thought of escaping the tower. Quinn sighed, knowing without my saying anything that once more I was choosing to ignore his earnest desires for me to escape. Though the conclusion of this familiar conversation was nothing new, for the first time I wondered if it was the wrong one.

“I’m sorry.” I wasn’t sure whether I was apologizing to him or to myself.

“I have no doubt that one day you’ll find your inner strength. You’re more capable than you believe, Gemma.”

Once more my gaze was drawn to him and I couldn’t make myself look away. Sweet understanding and sincerity filled his eyes as he looked at me, and I knew that no matter how weak I often felt, he accepted me as I was. My heart warmed at the thought, nourishing the new feeling blooming inside of me.

I wasn’t sure what compelled me to reach for him, only that the distance between us, as small as it was, had grown unbearable. I rested my hand over his, curling my fingers around his. He remained still, puzzlement marring his brow as he looked first at our connected hands then up at me, a question in his eyes, the same one I wondered.

What was happening between us?

I had no answer. All I knew was that holding his hand was unlike anything I’d ever experienced—it felt as if my heart was opening for him, inviting new possibilities I’d never before allowed myself to consider.

I feared the moment wouldn’t last before Quinn realized our touching hands went beyond the relationship expected between a guard and his charge, but to my fierce relief, he didn’t pull away. Instead his hand tightened around mine, nourishing my budding hope.

Despite my worries concerning the tower, my illness and limitations, and whether I’d be able to embrace my new hobby, they were nothing to the light now illuminating my heart. Because of the expectations I’d placed around myself, romance had never been a possibility I’d considered for my future.

But with every interaction with Quinn, those walls were crumbling brick by brick, allowing the sweet, beautiful feelings between us to grow. The larger they became, the more easily I was able to recognize them.

Yet my fear of exploring the unknown remained…though not as strong as it had once been, for the thought of a future with Quinn was far brighter. It was easy to disregard my worries the more I envisioned the wondrous landscape that lay ahead…and realized how much I liked it.

Would I be brave enough to embrace this future for myself? And what would I discover if I did?

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