Page 52 of Turret

Chapter 20

An urgent knock pierced the stillness of the night, yanking me from my restless sleep. I groggily sat up and glanced towards the door in sleepy confusion. “Who is it?” I managed around a yawn.

“Gemma!”

Quinn. Panic laced his voice, so unlike his usual calm manner. My worry flared, urging me to my feet too quickly, causing the world to sway; I clutched the bedpost to keep from stumbling. Even before I’d fully steadied, I lit the lantern at my bedside with shaking hands and tugged on my dressing gown before hurrying to open the door. My guard stood on the threshold dressed haphazardly, as if he’d yanked his clothes on in haste before coming to me.

My apprehension grew. “What is it, Quinn?”

My heart lurched as I took in his expression, lit by the orange glow of the lantern. His face was pale and his eyes were wide. He stared at me for a long moment before a sliver of relief penetrated his fear. He cradled my cheek. “I can still see you, but only just.”

My breath caught. “Did—you think you wouldn’t be able to?”

Rather than answering, he took my face in his hands and stared hungrily at me. “You’re so beautiful, Gemma. I pray my memory can do you justice…afterwards.”

My stomach lurched at his meaning, and I was forced to think about the very topic my thoughts had purposely been avoiding. “What do you mean?” I managed when I’d found my voice, even though with the apprehension tightening my chest I had a very clear idea what he meant.

He released a heavy sigh as he stepped into the room. “My apologies for disturbing you. I know it’s late, and that being with you alone at night is vastly inappropriate—”

“It’s no trouble.” I tried to sound calm in hopes of easing the tension and anxiety cloaking him, such a contrast to his usual rigid control. “Come, let’s sit down.” I took his hand and led him to the hearth.

As we settled, he glanced towards the crackling flames. “Is the fire still lit?” His voice was hesitant, as if fearing the answer.

My heart sank as I guessed the reason for his inquiry. “Can you not see it?”

He shook his head. “I can feel its warmth and hear it crackling. That’s the only reason I knew.” His gaze returned to me, looking very lost…and frightened. For a long moment he simply stared, as if he couldn’t look away. “I always sleep with my lantern lit so that I can avoid the darkness…before that’s all I ever see. I awoke suddenly tonight, only to discover that the curse had progressed rapidly while I’d slept. It’s almost victorious; for a moment I feared it was, for despite the lantern light, I saw…nothing.”

My heart pounded in a wild, unnatural rhythm in my chest. “How about now?”

“The only thing I can see…is you. The sweetness filling your eyes, your beauty, the faint orange glow of the firelight playing across your cheek and your hair…” His hand reached out to stroke it, his gaze riveted to the dancing light. “The way it highlights your hair…it’s so lovely. I know this will be the last time I ever see it.”

Tears burned my eyes at his words, but I forced myself to keep them back. I would be strong, a pillar in his time of need, just as he’d always been for me. But the task proved far more difficult when my heart was slowly breaking. “Are…you certain?”

He nodded. “I can feel the curse at work, taking the last of my sight. It’s as if night is settling over my senses, and once the sun sets, it won’t rise again.” He swallowed. “I know it’s going to be tonight. I don’t want to be alone. Please, Gemma, stay with me. I want you to be the very last thing I ever see.”

I’d never seen him so frightened. Despite trying desperately to be strong, my fragile emotions faltered and my tears escaped. “Oh, Quinn.” I embraced him and he held me, clinging to me like I was his life preserver midst the storm raging behind his eyes. But he didn’t hold me long before he pulled away, his gaze riveted to me.

“I must look at you…while I still can. Please, Gemma.”

I could only nod.

We remained at the hearth close to the firelight so that it could join the lantern light in illuminating the darkness for Quinn’s fading sight. I regretted it being the middle of the night, for I didn’t want it to be one of the last things he saw. I prayed the curse would hold off until the dawn to allow him to see at least one final sunrise.

The hours ticked by in silence, sand in an hourglass measuring the final moments of his sight. Not once did he look away from me. I watched the desperate way his gaze took me in, caressing every part of my face with an intensity like he was trying to memorize it.

The silence was thick and heavy, pressing around us and leaving me no distraction from my heartache. I ached to fill it, but there were no words adequate for the moment. My earlier tears had dried and I forced myself to keep the rest at bay; I could cry later when it was over and I was alone. Not only did I not want them to be one of the last things Quinn ever saw, but I wanted him to remember me as a strength, not the weak princess I often feared I was.

After two hours had slipped away, I finally spoke. “How can I help you?”

“You already are.” He still didn’t look away, his gaze riveted to me, filling with concern. “You look exhausted. I’m sorry I’m keeping you awake.”

“This is far more important than sleep.”

He still looked worried…and guilty. “But with your health…even with your elixir, I know how important your rest is—”

“Quinn,” I admonished gently. “I’m strong enough for this.”

Despite the gravity filling his expression, he managed a soft smile. “I know you are, Gemma. That’s the only reason I’m here. I knew I could ask this of you.” His fingertip gently traced over each of my features. “In this moment it’s hard to imagine I’ll ever forget you, for I know you so well. Yet I fear that the more time that passes…” He sighed but he didn’t drop his touch; he continued cradling my cheek, stroking my skin with his fingertips.

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