Page 25 of Decoy

Now the fun could really begin.

CHAPTER8

LUKE

My heart pounded relentlessly as I paced the abandoned corridor where I awaited the inevitable news that the princess had been murdered, an event in which I’d played such a horrific part.

I’d spent years imagining how I’d feel once I finally killed my first victim. Part of me hoped numbness would encase my heart to turn it into emotionless stone so I could face my future duties unhindered by my usual weakness…but instead, a tumultuous storm raged within me. Contrary to my hopes, performing my first kill hadn’t hardened me past feeling.

I had to fight the impulse to run into the other room to stop the inevitable before it occurred.No, you mustn’t! This death must happen. It’s your destiny to right the wrongs of the past; you have no choice.

I knew that, yet my desperation to revert this devastating course before it was too late lingered. I tried to convince myself it’d only be self-preservation to go back and stop her from drinking the tainted tea considering I was likely to be accused after pouring the tea in front of everyone and running away…but deep down I knew that wasn’t the true reason. For the first time, my hold over my usual show of confidence felt slippery, leaving me nothing to cling to in order to continue playing a part that ever since my birth into my cursed family had never felt like mine.

I couldn’t do this…yet I already had; there was no going back after I’d sold my soul. I’d never be able to face my sister now.

This had definitely been the most cowardly way to go about my mission. To think I’d spent years training in various methods of murder only to resort topoisonfor my first kill. At the time it’d been the most appealing for the simple reason it wouldn’t result in blood, allowing me to separate myself from the act in an attempt to convince my guilty conscience that it’d been an accident—I justso happenedto find the exact combination of tasteless, odorless herbs that would kill instantly, and justso happenedto drop them in the princess’s tea before hurrying away from the scene of the crime like a coward. I silently berated myself for being so obvious in my desperation.

Despite my vain attempts to separate myself from the responsibility of the dreaded deed, deep down I’d forever know I’d been the cause of her demise the moment I learned of it from the horrified chaos that was sure to follow.

Lingering to ensure she consumed the poison would have been too dangerous for my precarious resolve; I couldn’t afford for my persistent doubts to do something so foolish as knock the cup from her hands before she could take a deadly sip, nor stop myself from giving her the antidote the moment she collapsed. After all the effort I’d expended just to give it to her, I couldn’t falter now.

In the end I hadn’t gotten as much information from her as I’d hoped before her demise, but the longer we dragged out this cat-and-mouse chase, the more difficult it’d be to do what must be done. I tried to placate my escalating guilt with these lies as I paced the dark corridor with agitated steps, fighting the impulse to track down the poisoned cup before it was too late and she…

My stomach churned as my aversion consumed me at imagining her intriguing light suddenly snuffed out like a flame. The world spun, forcing me to shakily grope the wall to keep upright.

I had to stop it before it was too late. The image of the pale and lifeless princess urged me towards the parlor where I’d last seen my target. Breathless, I burst into the room, where much of the court was still assembled. All seemed normal as when I’d left…except for the fact the princess wasn’t amongst them. I hastened to where we’d been sitting but only found an empty cup.

I ignored the heat of several curious gazes as I snatched it and carefully examined it. A thin film coated the porcelain, the tell-tale sign of the toxic noxroot. It was without a doubt the poisoned cup, now entirely empty. Despite the uncanny calm filling the room, with Her Highness missing I feared the worst. Had she tried to return to her room and collapsed along the way?

My escalating panic pushed me from the room to hurry blindly through the corridors. I frantically chose directions en route to her bedroom as I searched…until I suddenly stopped short several twisting passages later. I clutched a stitch in my side as I fought for both breath and sense over the unbelievable image before me.

The princess. Alive.

I stared in frozen disbelief, taking in her windswept hair, the tension in her posture, her cheeks rosy with life, and most of all the vibrant fire raging in her eyes as she glared, all evidence that contradicted the pallid imaginings of death my mind had conjured.

This couldn’t truly be the princess. Surely she was nothing more than a figment of my conscience, created to escape my guilt from my horrific crime. I hadn’t killed her after all. A wave of fierce relief overcame me, so acute I nearly collapsed onto the floor; only years of rigorous training kept me upright.

How could she be alive? Did she not drink the tainted tea? But she must have; the cup had been empty. Had I mixed up the toxins and accidentally given her a more slow-acting poison…or none at all, as if my aversion to her death had subconsciously prevented me from giving her anything lethal?

Even though the attempt had failed, nothing could change the fact that I’dtriedto kill her. The confident assassin persona I’d spent years carefully crafting faltered, and bile rose in my throat as self-loathing consumed me.

I’d spent a lifetime trapped in the clutches of the infamous shadow house, wandering a labyrinth of darkness down a seemingly inevitable path despite my attempts to fight against my cursed fate…until the princess stood before me alive and well, offering me a pinprick of light to overcome the shadows that had haunted me ever since my birth.

I don’t want to be a murderer.

I’d somehow miraculously avoided the fate I’d fought against for so long. If I could escape what had felt like an impossible outcome, could I possibly find another path diverting from the future that until now I’d feared was set in stone?

Now wasn’t the time to explore such wonderings when the very much alive princess stood before me with a look thirsting for revenge that, strangely enough, only enhanced my irresistible draw towards her that my acute relief made impossible to resist.

Tension crowded the space between us as she stared, her eyes narrowed darkly. I managed a bow, sloppy from my tremors. “Princess! You’re looking…well.”

“Indeed.” Her tone was deathly, not what one would want to hear from such a beguiling woman.

Her nails dug into my arm as she suddenly seized hold of me to drag me deeper into the secluded shadows, a rather convenient arrangement—since the poison had obviously failed, for the sake of the mission and to ensure her silence regarding my dark role in it, I was left with no other option than to slit her throat.

The shadows’ sinister whispers attempting to lure me towards her demise were consumed by the riddle of the princess being alive, my acute relief, and the tingly heat of her touch that dispelled the pain from her sharp grip.

I didn’t question her when she led me to a secluded alcove that would grant us a private interrogation. “You’re the last person I should ever be alone with after what just happened.” Her angry whisper penetrated the strained silence, leaving me no doubt I was in disgrace, as I fully deserved.