Page 141 of Poison Aches

Grammy has been adamant about me letting go of those that never wanted me.

She’s right, of course, and in one area, I’ve managed to do that, but see, deep inside is still a little girl that just wanted to be like other kids.

To have a mother. A father. Parents. The two people that kids are conditioned to love no matter what.

So now, here I am.

There’s no turning back.

Feeling incredibly uncertain but excited, I make my way into the dimly lit bar with happy music playing.

New York City is an electric buzz of energy at all times, it seems, but so am I.

My stomach is in knots.

I’m literally about to meet the guy I’ve only ever talked to via gaming and texts.

I’ve heard his voice, of course, but I’ve never quite heard his name before and I met him just before Melissa contacted me.

I’m so grateful for Jackson because unlike my Westbrook Blues friends, he never tried to make me feel like I need a ‘there, there’ pat on the shoulder.

He just let me speak and unload my burdens as we played games.

I made a friend and now, I’m about to meet him.

“Good evening, what would it be for the beautiful lady?” the bartender asks when I take a seat at the bar.

“Uh, yeah. I’m meeting a friend, so I’ll wait.”

“A friend?”

“Yeah.”

“Have you met this friend before?”

If she’s asking that, then I guess I really do look out of place here.

“No, we met online.”

“Sis, better be careful with these online people. You never know,” she says, looking directly at me.

“Of course. Let’s see how it goes.”

“Well, order a flash bomb if you need help.”

I realize then that ‘flash bomb’ is a code word. Being a woman is so hard at times. Can’t even live without contingency plans all over the place.

“Thanks, girl!”

As she winks and walks away to serve another person, I pull out my phone, about to text Jackson. The good thing is, the bar he chose was a few blocks away from the hellish place I left my stuff packed and ready to go for later.

Someone taps me on the shoulder.

Startled, I turn around and come face to face with a handsome, tall guy.

His eyes are dark, with a buzz cut, and a slightly crooked nose as if it was broken before.

But beyond all that, he’s actually handsome, looks a bit shy and uncertain, but handsome.

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