Page 87 of Poison Aches

A phantom ache blooms in my chest when I hear his name.

All throughout the past two years, Emmett’s name has been mentioned in cautious, hesitant, but creative ways.

Sometimes I think they mention him in my presence just to gauge where I am with my heartbreak, but as I remain cooing and laughing at Knight in my arms, I act as if I didn’t even hear what Astraea just said.

“Well, who cares?” Kim waves her hand as if shooing the topic away “My wedding is in hundred days! So I demand happiness here and nothing else!”

Yes, the reason I’ve been dragged all over for fittings, tastings, meetings with event planners is this… Noah and Kim are getting married in a few weeks.

“I’m so excited for you! You’re getting married!” I squeal, which bothers Knight because he narrows his eyes at me.

“Right! Me. Getting married. I never thought I’d ever survive long enough to see my eighteenth birthday, so imagine me at twenty-seven, getting married to the one who awakened love in me through his love for me.”

“Awwww,” Astraea and I coo at the same time.

“She’s now poetic!”

“Yes, but she still cusses like a sailor and would slice up a bitch if needed.” Astraea side eyes her and we all laugh.

“Hey, what about Marie?” Astraea suddenly asks. “With you leaving, it must be hard for her.”

Another ache blooms in my heart whenever I think of my grandmother.

This has happened before. I’ve left her before, but back then we had no choice…

Now, I’m just…well, everything I’m about to do now is for her.

“She’s not happy, of course, but she said she’ll support any decision I make.”

Actually, her direct words were more dizzying than that.

She looked at me deeply and said,“Well, now you’re finally spreading your wings to fly instead of staying in a place that has made you a prisoner, shackling your wings.”

Did she always know that I’ve always felt like I’m in a prison?

Sometimes I’m pretty sure she’s been aware of how much I’ve been suffocating in this town even though I’ve never said a word.

Kim opens her mouth to say something, but Astraea beats her to it. “Well, just like Marie, the rest of us are going to support you as well.”

“I didn’t say I’m not supporting her,” Kim huffs. “I’m saying this move seems so abrupt to me.” My heart jumps at those words. “I hope everything is all right, Ivy.”

I look away from them both, trying to calm my heart and mind. I can’t afford to blow my cover now. If they find out, then no doubt my brother and grandmother will too, then I won’t get the chance to meetthem.

“Yes, of course everything is all right. I just… I need to do this.”

Silence falls between us.

“Well, maybe this time you’ll actually lose your freaking virginity and roll around in someone’s steamy sheets!” Astraea says and I can’t help but smile.

“You know what, I’m looking forward to that!” I pick up Knight and burp him gently.

Kim snorts. “Didn’t you say you still haven’t opened that toy you bought over a million years ago?”

I shoot her a look. “Why are you all up in my vagina business lately? I’ll get to it when I can.”

“Or maybe you don’t know how to use it,” she counters. “Do you want an instructional guide? Or maybe you’d like it as a video demonstration? I’m pretty sure Noah can help me?—”

“Ah la la la la la,” I singsong, glaring at my naughty friend who has no qualms discussing raunchy smut talk. “Baby here! And the walls have ears!”

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