Page 14 of Her Bear of a Duke

"You do not need to be grateful for a match you did not ask for," Cecilia said firmly. "If it were me, I would have escaped to the country long ago. I cannot believe that the two of you simply accept this."

She was looking almost accusingly at Dorothy and Emma, and though she wished her friend could be kinder Dorothy knew that it was what she needed to hear. She was not happy with what was happening to her, and the only reason she had acceptedit was because she did not want to become like her sister. She did not want to be cut off from society, with even her family uncertain as to where she was and whether or not she was all right.

"You know perfectly well why I accepted what happened to me," Emma argued. "I had acted in an unbecoming manner, and in response I had to take Levi as my husband. We are all aware of the consequences that could follow from such behavior, Cecilia."

"Then you of all people should know not to ask Dorothy whether or not she wants this. If she did not, she would have done something about it. She certainly would not have kissed him."

"I did not know that he was my husband-to-be at the time," Dorothy tried to explain, but neither lady was looking at her.

"You are not perfect, Cecilia. Instead of passing judgment, do what we must now do and comfort our friend. She has enough to think about without us chastising her. What's happened has happened."

"You might not like thinking about this, as it reminds you of what you did, but it is the truth. I do not want to sit and listen to you pretending there was nothing more that Dorothy could have done."

Without another word, Cecilia left the room.

Beatrice and Dorothy exchanged worried glances, while Emma remained where she was.

"I– I will go and speak with her," Beatrice said quietly before following after Cecilia.

Emma did not look at Dorothy. Instead, she looked at her teacup, her head down.

"I do not know what she wants from us," she sighed.

"I do not think she meant anything by it. She is concerned for me, that is all. I had thought, if anything, she would be rather proud of me for what I did."

"She is, believe me. I wonder if that is what she is truly upset about."

Dorothy raised an eyebrow at her.

"Think about it, Dot. In all of the time we have known her, our parents have labelled her a terrible influence, claiming that we should avoid her. She is not stupid. She knows what people think of her. Now that the both of us have done something so reckless, while she has never done anything of the sort, it likely has changed things."

"I suppose it is quite unfair that we have done what we have, yet she is the one to have gained a reputation such as hers."

"Precisely, but that does not mean that she can blame us. I pity her, but I will not allow her to speak to you for doing something for yourself for the first time."

The two ladies fell silent for a moment. Dorothy did not know what to say to her; with all that had happened in the last year, she had tried to bite her tongue about her own match so that they could have some peace for a while, but that had not been what had happened.

The issue was that when she was quiet, she began to think. The silence led to her thoughts running away from her time and time again, and the closer to the wedding she came the worse it was.

She was to be a wife to a stranger, and though he seemed perfectly fine there was nothing stopping him from changing once she was his. It happened often enough. She wanted to believe that he was a good man, and that he would care for her, but it was just as likely that he would leave her alone most of the time, and she would have no company with the exception of an children they might have.

"Did you want children?" she asked aloud.

"I did," Emma nodded, smiling softly. "I will admit, it is not what I had planned, and sometimes I am terrified of what is to come, but it is something that Levi and I are excited about more than anything."

"What are you afraid of? You have a loving marriage, and you will be able to take care of the baby's needs."

"I worry that I will not be a good mother. It is entirely possible."

"No it isn't. You will be a wonderful mother, especially given that you practically raised your sister yourself."

"I did, but that does not mean that I will be any good as a mother. Besides, there is more to it than that. I fear that something will happen to me, the same way we lost my mother after my sister was born. Again, it may not happen, but it could, and that frightens me."

Dorothy had not considered that, and it gave her even more fears about what was to come.

"All that to say," Emma continued, placing a hand on Dorothy's shoulder, "we do not know what is coming. It is frightening, but if we live in fear then we will not live at all. I am choosing to be excited for the next part of my life, and I believe it would be best if you did the same thing."

Dorothy nodded in agreement. Her marriage was a daunting prospect, but Emma was right. She had to look forward to it, or else she would risk ruining it before it had even begun. She could not control her husband, but she could control whether or not she was a good wife, which she was determined to be.

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