Page 51 of Chasing You

He wraps his arms around me, dragging me into his side. “You are ridiculous,” he kisses my nose. “Remarkable.” A kiss to my neck. “Outrageous.” My shoulder.

“Outrageous?!” I ask, but can’t help the giggle when his lips meet the inside of my elbow.

“Beautiful. Intelligent. Captivating,” he carries on, planting kisses all over my body. “You make me feel things I never thought I would feel,couldfeel.”

My breath stalls in my lungs, I can’t even exhale, not while he’s looking at me like he is right now. Like I’m the center of his world. I think he’s the center of mine too.

“What do you want for yourself?” he asks in the wake of my silence. “For your life, for your future. What do you want?”

His voice holds a simple curiosity, but there's a look in his eyes as he waits for my answer. Like he’s more than just curious, like he’s desperate to know.

I don’t have to think for long; I’ve always wanted the same thing.

I lay back on the couch, letting my legs fall over his lap. “I want to be surrounded by love. I want to own a bar that people love to work in, and love to drink in. I want to have friends of my own, a group of girls I can rely on no matter what. Don’t get me wrong, my cousin’s friends are essentially my brothers at this point, and I know they look out for me like brothers would but… I don’t know.” I shake my head, fighting off all of the images that float into my brain, but Miles just looks at me, waiting for me to spit it out.

“You know I’m an only child, and my parents are amazing, I couldn’t have asked for a better upbringing,” I cringe internally thinking about Miles’s own upbringing, but he doesn’t so much as blink. “But I always wished our family was bigger. That’s what Iwant more than anything. I want a loving husband, a house with a garden big enough that however many kids we have can run around and be free. I want to be a good mother, I want a family of my own, and a big kitchen where I can bake at midnight if I really wanted to. That’s all I’ve ever really wanted for myself.”

He looks at me like I just told him he’s having a life-saving surgery, like a surge of relief, and happiness is flowing through him, but also like a little part of him wants to cry. I don’t know what to make of it.

He shovels a handful of popcorn in his mouth, promptly avoiding anything that might have been said.

“What do you want, Miles?”

He scratches the back of his head, almost as if it’s a question he’s never been asked. “I’ve never really thought about it.”

I sit up. “What do you mean? You’ve never imagined what your future would look like?”

He gives his head a subtle shake. “I don’t—” He lets out a breath. “I mean, I have wondered what I’ll do. But the vision has always been…blurry, I guess. All I’ve known is that I want to be a pilot, that I want to be a captain. Anything beyond that has always felt—I don’t know.”

I just grab his hand in mine, our fingers slipping together. I can’t imagine having no idea how I wanted my life to pan out. I know things don’t always go to plan, but I’ve always had one.

I can’t help but wonder whether being a pilot really is his dream, or if he merely thinks that’s what his dream should be. If it’s just what he thinks he should be chasing, because that’s all he’s ever been told to chase.

“But your vision,” he says quietly, “that sounds like it might be alright.”

chapter twenty-one

MARINA

PRESENT

I breathe deepas the ocean breeze tosses my hair over my shoulders. Singular grains of sand crunch underfoot as I bat a branch out of my way, shuffling down a bank until my feet land in the warm sand.

I swear I can feel the weight lift off my shoulders just as I wriggle my toes, letting the grains slip over my skin.

This is one of my favorite places to be, when my mind is spinning, when I’m tired, when all of life just gets a bit too much, this is where I come. And today, I need a little peace.

A deep sting has been building behind my eyes since I woke up this morning, the headache making me want to do nothing else but stay in bed. Dread fills me knowing my period is coming up. It feels like I’ve only just gotten over the lingering symptoms from my last one, but a bad headache and subsequent tiredness are always the first warning signs for me. So I decided to turn my day around by coming down here.

I dip under another low branch, the view clearing in front of me. Turquoise blue water spreads as far as the horizon, with greenery keeping this little alcove from view. This little spot is onethat isn’t well known by many people in Ruby Cove, and it’s the perfect place to escape without going too far.

After a few steps into the private heaven, my view is obscured by a head bobbing just above the water. I recognize it immediately.

Miles runs a hand through his brown waves before lying back in the water, floating on his back.

I take another step forward as my eyes catch on his abdomen floating just above the surface, the water sliding over the ridges of his abs when the small waves move past his body. God, he’s even fitter than he was all those years ago. My knees weaken at the sight of him, at the sight of the rigid V lines leading down to…nothis swim shorts.

Oh my god. He’s skinny dipping.

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