Page 55 of Chasing You

But I can’t promise her the future she wants. I can’t be the person she wants for her future, I’m not him. This life is all I know.

I’ve just started taking on more flights again, and as much as I hate being away from Marina, I love being in the sky again. I can’t give this up, this job, this career I’ve spent my entire life working toward. I’m so close to everything I’ve ever wanted, I can’t justgive that all up now. That would make me a failure, and that’s something I’ve never been; I’m not going to start now.

But I don't know where that leaves Marina and me. I can't imagine my life without this job, but now, after being with her, I somehow can’t imagine my life without her either.

But it could never work. We’d barely see each other. I don’t know how I could commit to anything, and she deserves more than stolen moments and time crunches on our time spent together. I can’t ask her to wait around for me all the time, even if there is nothing I'd rather do in my spare moments than be with her. I can’t make this work, I can't have it both ways. I need to make a choice, one that’s consequences could follow me for years to come. I don’t know how I could ever make that decision, but it will be chasing me until I do.

chapter twenty-three

MARINA

PRESENT

“You couldn’t be moreawkward if you tried,” May says from where she’s opening the fridge in Caio and Isla’s kitchen.

I roll my eyes. “Okay, I don’t know what you expect when there are fewer than ten people standing between me and my ex right now.”

She pours orange juice into a glass, making me wonder why she’s not pulling out the bottle of bubbles instead. “There waswayless than ten people between you when you saw him at the beach the other day.”

“Yeah, well, he wasn’t wearing a suit that day, either.”

“No,” she raises her eyebrows. “He wasn’t wearing anything at all, was he?”

I drop my head down, leaning it on the top of my arms that are resting on the marble bench top. “I regret telling you about that.” It comes out muffled.

She just cackles. “Okay, but why does him being in a suit matter? Unless it’s the fact that you’re overly attracted to him,even if you’re trying to pretend that you’re totallynotattracted to him at all.”

I look up at her once again. “Well, breaking my heart sure didn’t make him ugly.”

If anything, it made him even hotter.Karma can go fuck itself.

May just shakes her head. “You’re aware you’ve basically already admitted to me that you’re still in love with him, right? You don’t have to keep up the act.”

I frown. “I amnotstill in love with him. I never said that.”

May tips her head, a sympathetic look in her eyes. “You didn’t have to.”

I look over my shoulder to see him talking with Leo, who’s decked out in a dark suit of his own.

All the boys decided to dress up in suits to look like Caio, and May and I are rocking sundresses to imitate our girl Isla.

But Miles, he looks devastatingly handsome in a sand-toned suit that complements the tan he’s built since being here. His somewhat scruffy hair is tamed back, and he’s even freshly shaven, still leaving the perfect amount of stubble, and of course, that mustache.

They should be back from their honeymoon any minute. Miles was annoyingly helpful in letting us know the progress of their flight and when it landed in Rome. So as long as they didn’t make any stops along the way, they should be here any minute. Though knowing those two, I wouldn’t be surprised if they couldn’t make it the whole drive here without getting their hands on each other.

I don’t love Miles.Idon’t. Nope, noooo. No, I don’t.

Wow, I can’t even do a good job at convincing myself.

I let out a sigh, grabbing May’s glass of orange juice and chugging it. Though it doesn’t quite have the effect I’m looking for.

I haven’t been able to get Miles off my mind. Not after he touched me in the water that day. The feeling of his skin on mine is enough to send me over the edge, careening straight back into falling for him. Or at least acknowledging that I never really climbed back up that cliff in the first place.

So I just need to make sure that he doesn’t touch me again. Five feet of distance at all times.

May just fills back up the glass without a word, I can feel her watching me but she stays quiet. Just when I think she might say something, the door to the apartment bursts open.

A cacophony of greetings comes from the boys, all of them walking towards the door to greet Caio and Isla as they walk into the apartment. Everyone but Miles, who stays seated on the edge of the couch, a small smile on his face as he watches everyone else.

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