Page 1 of Forbidden Love

Prologue

Yeremy

They say daughters love their father’s first, and I did. I loved my father, Casper, in a way that made other people uncomfortable. Especially if they never had a relationship with their father. I looked up to him and looked at him like he could fix anything with a snap of his fingers or a nod of his head. Although my father was not a good man by society’s standards, and he didn’t try to be by far… to me, he was everything. It didn’t matter if him and Momma wasn’t together; he stepped up and did what any man in his position probably wouldn’t do… raise me.

Casper was my protector, provider, and professor of hard truths. He wore danger like a tailored suit; smooth and pressed, stitched with blood and loyalty. It’s been eight months since I lost him, and my heart still thumped differently when I think of him. My father was feared in every borough and respected by every kingpin who ever touched the kind of power that he had and still have till this day.

It was hard losing a parent that was still alive, especially if you were stubborn like myself. I felt like I had a point to prove, like me and Ramsey could make it through our ups and downs. I wanted to prove that my man, Ramsey, was a good man andwould love me correctly besides all the street credit and the bitches that constantly ran after him. It was a hard decision that I made eight months ago; it still hurts me, but I just can’t leave Ramsey.

Ramsey didn’t understand how I felt. He has no fear of Casper, and I respect him for that. Most men would have never looked my way, just because of me being the daughter of the infamous Casper. To me, he was just my daddy and best friend. The man who brushed the edges of my hair with hands still dusted in gunpowder. The man who kissed my forehead in the morning before school with the same mouth that gave kill orders.

Casper always said that I was his redemption, that no matter how deep he sank into the mud of the streets, he wanted me clean. He paid every cent of my way through nursing school, even sat in the front row with watery eyes next to my momma when I walked across the stage. He just hated Ramsey, because Ramsey reminded him of himself when he was young.

Same night of my graduation, Casper gave me an ultimatum. We all sat around the table at an expensive steak house that he bought out just for family. He ignored my mom, and I wished he hadn’t. He broke her heart each time they ended up in the same room together. I could tell Momma spent her last on getting the updo hairstyle that fit her face. Momma looked good with a skintight, cheetah romper glued on to her curvy short frame. She matched her fit with six-inch black stiletto heels that had cheetah print on the straps.

Instead of Casper showing up to dinner with two new women on each side of him, he showed up with his well-respected men; one of those men was Sol. There was no secret that Sol became Daddy’s right-hand man in training. Casper took him under his wing after Sol’s father died from a heart attack. Sol was the next new kingpin, and Casper was teaching him all the ropes. I neverknew too much of what all went on behind the scenes. All I knew was Sol looked deadly and handsome as hell. He never said much, just observed everybody surrounding him.

Momma kept eyeing Ramsey, I could the see the concern in her eyes for my man. We all knew how my dad got down, even though it was hard to read him based off his stone-cold facial expression. The only time Casper changed his facial expressions was when it came to me. Casper’s chocolate eyes landed on me as he spoke low but loud enough for everyone to hear.

“I’d rather bury you in silk before seeing you shackled to a nigga like that.” He pointed at Ramsey who stiffened next to me.

I silently thanked Ramsey with my eyes for not popping off on my dad. The servers brought out our food and Casper didn’t bother to eye his plate. Ramsey bit into his bottom lip, his caramel complexion turned a shade red. I knew my man very well. He never allowed anyone to disrespect him to his face. Right now wasn’t the time to play tough with Casper sitting across from him. Daddy was handsome and perfect looking, but so was the devil himself. With the snap of his fingers, Casper would end Ramsey.

“Pick,” Casper said, voice low and deadly.

I still remember the feeling of my stomach dropping and churning. Casper never looked at me that way, his look alone made me emotional.

“Live under my roof and finish the legacy I bled for or run behind that nigga who’s gone get you killed or put in jail.” His voice elevated.

“Casper!” My mom yelled across the table.

“You want her to finish your legacy that can result in the same fucking thing!” Momma rolled her eyes.

“My daughter will always remain clean. She’s my only child, and she will have all of my money when I go. People will always treat her like the queen she will learn to be. She will not be withthat nigga, or any other street nigga. I stand on it.” He slammed his callous hands against the table, making everyone except Ramsey and Sol gasp.

“Let the girl be, Casper! You can’t just?—”

“Shut up bitch! Mind yo mu’fuckin manners. I raised her, Yeremy is my child. You ain’t shit but the hoe I cracked on the first night looking for a fuckin’ come up. You never even fought to be a mother. I don’t know why Yeremy even acknowledges you. To keep it a buck-fifty, I blame you, Banita. She want a hood nigga cause when she visited yo ass that’s all you had around her, thinking that shit was gone make me jealous…Instead, it made yo pussy stretch and stank.” He waved her off.

“Enough of the small talk.” Casper snapped his fingers.

I felt for my momma, but she never stood up for herself. None of the women Casper dealt with stood up for themselves. Momma never cared about Casper’s dismissiveness or mean words that he spewed out to her. Anytime he wanted her, he got her. She loved being around him, although their time was never long with one another. She was just the woman that he couldn’t convince to have an abortion. He loved Momma’s cooking, yet hated her ghetto, selfish ways.

“Pick, baby girl. You know I love you and want the best for you. You too beautiful, too perfect to be with the likes of him.”

That night I begged Casper to see Ramsey how I saw him, I poured my heart out only to watch my father have the housemaid, Esmeralda, pack all of my things and sit them outside. He promised to deposit fifteen thousand into my account then told me that I could come home when I came to my senses. I was twenty-five, grown and soft with love. I just didn’t understand why Casper couldn’t see it all the way that I saw it.

Now, I stood at my kitchen sink in the small apartment in Compton that Ramsey and I shared. I stared out the window as I took slow sips of my red wine. I stared out into the street, looking at nothing in particular. It was Friday night, and I was thinking about Casper. I missed my dad’s voice, even missed his silence when he was angry. I picked up my blunt from the ashtray and lit it.

I took a glance at my phone and thought about calling Ramsey but decided against it. I loved Ramsey with my eyes open. I kept my heart locked in a cage but kept giving Ramsey’s dog ass the key to it. Every time he took the key, I prayed he wouldn’t throw it away, but that’s exactly what it started to feel like.

Here I was, trying to prove Casper wrong, when this was the part he already saw coming. Ramsey coming in late was the norm for any woman staying down with a street nigga. The sound of his heavy Timberlands thudding against the floor made my heart rate speed up before he even walked in the kitchen.

“Ma, you up?” He asked, voice low and husky.

I rolled my eyes and kept my back turned in the kitchen. Ramsey knew I was up. Friday nights was supposed to be our night after I got off of work to smoke, chill, and catch up with one another. When it came to Ramsey, he made me feel things in extremes. Half the time it was either me wanting to hold him close to me and never let him go… or it was me wanting to beat his ass so he could remember who the hell he had waiting at home.

“I’m in here.” I set my wine glass down.

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