Page 37 of Forbidden Love

Every light I passed blurred into streaks of white and gold as I sped through the city like something was chasing me. I clenched my steering wheel tightly as I ignored the way my phone lit up again and again on the passenger seat. One second it was Sol, then the text notification lit up. The next second it was Bianca calling back-to-back.

I hated how a small part of me wanted to answer just to hear her say that none of it was true. That those weren’t his kids and that she hadn’t spent years lying to me with a smile painted on her face like she really was my best friend.

I hit a hundred on the freeway and didn’t slow down until I turned down the quiet gated street that led to my father’s estate. It had always been an entire world away from the hell thatawaited me in the ‘Real World’. I needed my dad, and I didn’t give a damn if he said ‘he told me so’ a million times to my face.

His iron gates opened like arms that I needed around me. I drove up the long-curved driveway shaking. After putting my car in park, I left my keys, phone, and purse in the car. Right now, I didn’t give a damn about nothing but getting to Casper.

I ran up the steps to the double doors; before I could try the door handle, Esmeralda opened the double doors with a worried look etched on her face.

“Casper?” I asked her with my voice cracking.

“In his study with ju ma ma.” She spoke with her heavy accent.

I took off toward the hallway, and the closer I got, the heavier my sobs became. It wasn’t a surprise that my mom was here. Casper always talked bad about her and acted like she was just another woman on his roster. It was something about chocolate drop beautiful Benita that always had her popping up randomly. Most of the time when my mom visited, I wasn’t aware. They kept their weird relationship to themselves. Whenever I tried to tell my mom that she deserved better, she get offended and tell me that she wasn’t waiting around for Casper.

That was true, she dated different guys. I just hated the way she came running whenever he sent for her. Just like Esmeralda said, I found them in the study. The room was lit by tall lamps and the flicker of the fireplace. My mom sat ghetto-fabulous and unbothered with her legs crossed on my dad’s black velvet chaise. She leaned over my dad’s outstretched hands and filed his nails with exaggerated care.

Her long acrylics was hot pink with rhinestones that flashed each time she turned his hand.

“I should paint these muthafucka’s pink like mine…put a little glitter on that shit.” She laughed.

The smell of weed told me that they was both high as hell vibing. This was the side of my parent’s that I never got to witness. How they acted with one another behind closed doors had me standing in disbelief.

“Don’t play with me, Nita. You spending too much time on my damn hands. I’m ready for you to do my feet.” He chuckled, which surprised me too.

My dad’s salt-and-pepper waves was shaped enough to slice through tension. His fade was fresh, and his beard shined like he had my mom wash and moisturize it. His cigar was perched in the corner of his mouth as he sat back relaxed in his leather chair. The way he looked at her made my heart crack. It made me wonder who initially hurt who to make them not be together.

He must have felt me, his eyes snapped over toward me. He sat up fast and straightened his posture as he snatched his hands out of my mom’s grasp like he had been caught doing something that he wasn’t supposed to be doing.

“Move Benita,” he said sharply, flicking his wrist.

My mom rolled her eyes then looked at the nail file.

“Don’t start all that funny shit now, Casper. Damn always?—”

“I said move! My baby is fucking crying!” His voice boomed.

My mom clicked her tongue, she sighed dramatically then stood with her hand on her hip. Her mouth moved but I didn’t hear shit she was saying as I crossed the room. Casper stood, his broad shoulders casted a shadow against the bookshelf behind him. He looked me over, his eyes narrowed at my wet cheeks then his eyes roamed up to my trembling lips. His aura darkened as he licked his lips, his jaws clenched before he spoke.

“It’s that doctor nigga?” His brows bunched together.

“No,” I whispered.

Casper exhaled like he was relieved.

“Well…who the fuck do I need to kill?” He muttered low enough for just me to hear him.

“Bianca—I don’t want you to kill her…she’s just?—”

“Not a real friend. I told you this already baby girl.” He pulled me into him, and I broke down.

I collapsed into his chest like I used to when I was a little girl. I poured my heart out with my sobs and no words.

“I’m fenna go beat that bitch ass! What the fuck she do?” My mom yelled out from behind me.

“She—had—kids—by…” It hurt me too much to finish my sentence.

“She only had one by that sorry ass nigga.” Casper completed my sentence.