Page 94 of Salvation

It was late when we got back to the clubhouse, and I was feeling more than a little emotionally drained.

I fucking hated to see my dad cry, and I hated it even more that I was the cause of it.

I thought I had given my parents enough stress when I was a teenager, and yet here I was, making their lives even more difficult when they were in their golden years.

Imagine going on a world cruise—something that many people could only ever dream of doing—and yet you don’t even know where your only child is, or whether or not they were safe. Even though my dad had assured me it wasn’t a big deal, I knew it would have hung over him like a dark cloud. Their relationship had seemed strained, and I didn’t like thinking I was the cause of it. Even before my dad had awkwardly walked in on me and my mum arguing, their relationship was a far cry from the one I had seen when my dad was first released from prison. My dad had done so much for me, giving away his freedom to ensure I was happy and safe. He deserved so much better.

At least the kids seemed happy around them, though. My mum had been decent for a change and held her tongue. She had even told me I was doing a good job with them. I knew it was killing her not to ask me about Bee being mute, but I was grateful that she decided to behave herself and not pry.

And, in the interest of being honest, I got a sick thrill out of not giving her the answers she was looking for.

And then she had to go and fucking ruin everything.

I had ended up taking the kids to the park myself, not wanting to disappoint them any further. I saw a flicker of disappointment in Bee’s eyes, but it was soon replaced when I told her this would be Axel’s very first time on the swings, and that she could push him if she liked.

The park had been a hit, and I had even heard Bee giggling a few times whilst playing with her brother.

The sound was like music to my ears, and it strengthened my resolve to get her talking again. Her voice was still in there somewhere, we just had to work through her trauma together.

It would be a battle, but it would be the most rewarding fucking battle we could ever fight.

That evening, after giving the kids a quick meal and tucking them into bed, I went back downstairs looking for Dante, wanting to get our obligatory hour over and done with. I was exhausted. Between therapy, being snapped at by Dante earlier, and my parents, the thought of an awkward evening ahead made every step I took weigh heavy on me. I was practically dragging my feet by the time I got to the bottom of the stairs, wanting to take myself to bed and ignore the rest of the world.

However, as the saying goes, Mama didn’t raise no bitch.

My mother didn’t really raise me at all, but still… I wasn’t going to chicken out at the first hurdle.

I took a quick look around the house, not seeing Dante anywhere, so I headed to the bar. As soon as I stepped through the archway, I saw him and Vienna quietly arguing in the corner.

The bar was busy tonight. It seemed as though every member of the club was here, excluding Mama, of course. The music was loud, but not loud enough that conversations couldn’t be had. I saw Shark and Ant at the pool table. Hacksaw and Chris were sitting in one of the booths, their heads close together as they discussed something. Bambi, Greg, and Pivot were by the doors, keeping lookout, and Sunshine and Tools were playing darts. There were some campaigners lingering here and there, and a couple of the club whores cheering on the different games like perfect, perky teenagers.

They were full of shit. I had seen Shark at that pool table many times. He may be a decent rider, but he couldn’t aim those balls for shit. There was no way any performance he put on deserved that level of enthusiasm.

Vienna would love to live in my head right now. The jokes he would make over Shark’s ball performance would be relentless.

“Rachel!” I heard Jenna call over the noise of the bar. I spun around to see her sat at one of the booths with the rest of the old ladies. I raised my hand to wave at her and they all burst out laughing.

“Why the fuck are you waving at us? Come and join us!” Gemma yelled over. Dante turned his head when he heard my name called and gave me a questioning look, as though he were pondering my next move. He knew this was awkward for me, considering half the bar had slagged me off not long ago, but I wasn’t one to hide in the shadows. I had a long few months ahead of me, so it was best to make my presence known.

“We were beginning to think you were avoiding us,” Imogen frowned at me as I walked over. Jenna all but shoved The Birdsover to make room for me, and I shot her a grateful smile as I slid in next to her.

“I wasn’t avoiding you. I just didn’t know if any of you would want to talk to me.”

“Since when has that stopped you?” Gemma asked with a small laugh.

“Oh, it wouldn’t ordinarily. It's that—”

“Contract,” she finished for me with a nod. I snapped my head to Jenna, who shrugged at me.

“Oh, come on! That’s the most exciting thing I’ve heard all week! You’re mad if you thought I wasn’t going to tell them. Sometimes all this quiet makes me miss the war.”

“Jenna!” Imogen snapped.

“What?” she said innocently, her eyes growing wide.

I kicked her under the table and nodded my head in Trent’s direction, who was sitting at the opposite end of the bar, his eyes glued to a sheet of paper. I knew they were coming up to the weekly bike ride, so I guess he was doing his job as road runner and planning their route.

“I’m not going to apologise! I know Trent lost his dad, and that’s incredibly sad. But you’ve got to admit, it’s been dull as fuck around here. I’m waiting on Rachel throwing something at Dante to liven things back up.”

---