Page 15 of So This Is Love

“And me and your father didn’t do everything a hundred percent right all the time. You just have to do your best and hope your kids turn out okay.”

There’s a sadness that comes over her voice when she talks about my dad, evidence of the hurt and grief that still fills her body. I step closer and wrap my arm around her shoulders.

“Y’all did great. Even if I am still haunted by peas.”

She chuckles and elbows me in the side. “Go wash your hands so we can eat.”

I wash my hands in the powder bathroom right off the kitchen. As I walk back I take out my phone just to make sure I haven’t missed any important messages. A smile comes to my face when I see the one at the very top.

withlove.laila

at work. i’ve been doing a photoshoot all day so no time for stalking (:

6

Laila

“What are you overthere smiling about?” Zara asks, standing in the doorway to my room.

“Nothing,” I reply quickly.

I close the message that I had been reading from Sonny and look at Zara. I can tell by the look on her face that she doesn’t believe me, but she lets me have it and doesn’t push for more information. Sonny and I have been talking back and forth for a few days now. There are often long stretches in between replies and we’ve moved from DMs to texting directly but it's been consistent. But talking to him hasn’t been something that I’m ready to share with anyone quite yet.

Zara knows about the first time I ran into Sonny, I spilled everything to her in our college apartment over greasy burgers and fries when we both got home after the concert. We speculated and analyzed every little thing that I could remember about the interaction, but ultimately I decided to chalk it up to just a random run in and go on about my life. And that had been going just fine for me, until I ran into him again.

The odds of me running into Sonny the first time? Dismal. The odds of me running into Sonny again and him wanting to exchange information that subsequently leads to us talking back and forth for days? It should be nonexistent, but here the fuck I am. I haven’t told her anything about what’s happened recently between me and Sonny.

Me and Sonny?

No.

There is nome and Sonny.

I haven’t told her about running into Sonny and talking to him, mainly because I know that she’ll put more weight into it than I want to at this moment. She’ll see it as a sign, some sort of divine intervention bringing us together or something, and I just don’t want that right now. I don’t have time for that right now and it's only been a few months since… Devin.

I inwardly cringe at even the thought of him and decide to push all those thoughts away and instead focus on Zara.

“A better question is what kept you out all night, hmm?” I ask, turning the attention back on her instead of me.

“Nolan came to see me at the shop and we went back to his place.”

“Is that the chef?”

“Nooo,” Zara replies, shaking her head. “That’s Aaron, Nolan is the surgeon. The one I went to San Diego with last summer.”

“Ohhh right, I forgot about him.”

Zara’s roster of men is always impeccable. She makes it very clear that she doesn’t want anything serious, that they will never be “boyfriend and girlfriend” and that she’s just there for a good time. And every so often guys will fall off the roster leaving space for a new man. It's truly amazing to see in person and I love it for her because she’s totally content with it.

“What are your plans for the day?” Zara asks.

I take an Oreo out of the package that’s sitting next to me in my bed and use it to gesture to the TV. “You’re looking at it.”

“Orrrr,” Zara starts.

I groan, knowing that whatever Zara is about to say involves real clothes and leaving this apartment.

“We could go out.”

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