Page 81 of Meet Me on Lilac Lane

She wasn’t going anywhere without her guys.

Bringing them on the boat had been a big mistake.

Cody sat on the edge of Maggie’s bed in her room. Next to him, the little girl slept under her pink unicorn quilt, clutching her purple bobble hat and her stuffed bunny. The bandage at her hairline made her look so vulnerable. Her gentle snore lifted the corner of his mouth. Mia sat next to him, eyes closed, a hand on Maggie’s chest. After the trauma of the clinic, he welcomed this peace. Well, outward peace anyway. Inside, his gut churned. Across the room, Finn’s bed lay empty. They’d called Constance to pick him up at the clinic, and she’d volunteered to keep him overnight.

The sharp tang of the antiseptic the nurse used on Maggie’s wound hung in the air. She should never have been in a position to have the stitches in the first place.

“Mia, I’m sorry, this is all my fault.” He swiped at his eyes then crossed his arms. They ached to gather Maggie up, or Mia, or both of them. But that was a bad idea. Having Mia in his arms was part of the reason they were here in the first place. They should have never taken their eyes off the kids. “I never should have taken you out there.”

Mia’s eyes flew open. “Code. Stop. Accidents happen with little kids. There is no way this is your fault.” Keeping one hand on Maggie, she rested the other on Cody’s knee. The heat from her touch soaked into a frozen place inside him.

“One of your kids got hurt.” Cody couldn’t look at her. Didn’t want to see the truth reflected in her eyes. “Loss follows me, and I should have remembered that.”

“What in the world are you talking about?”

“I thought I’d gotten to a good place, started to believe that maybe…” He inhaled sharply. “But the truth is, I got your husband killed, and now I almost killed your daughter. And it doesn’t matter how much I plan or try to be careful…loss just seems inevitable.”

Mia laughed, a short, humorless bark. She patted Maggie and then gave his knee a squeeze. “Come on. Let’s go into the kitchen where we don’t have to whisper. Plus, this kind of conversation needs more hot chocolate.”

While Mia heated water for the instant hot chocolate, Cody took two mugs out of the cupboard. Soon, cups filled, they sat at the table. The steam curled up between them.

Mia reached for his hand. She held it in both of her own. Her thumbs tightened her grip. “Listen to me carefully. I need you to hear me.” She paused, took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “I don’t blame you for Troy’s death. I never have.”

He kept his eyes on the table. Her words dinged against the armor he had built for himself.

“Please look at me,” she said.

He raised his gaze to meet hers. Expecting pity, he saw something closer to grace instead, maybe even love.

She waited a beat, keeping eye contact. “What happened that terrible night was not your fault. It has never been your fault.”

“And I’m starting to believe it. But”—the words tore from him, leaving a raw wound in their wake—“my dad blames me for all of it.”

“Has he told you that?”

“Not in so many words. But he doesn’t have to say it. He’s told me in a thousand other ways.”

“I can’t believe an old fisherman like your dad would blame you for the weather.”

“Why do you think he won’t sell me the business? He doesn’t trust me anymore. And I don’t think he ever will.”

“Again, has he ever said that to you?”

“Yes.” Or did he? What did he say? Cody thought back over their conversations. Huh, he couldn’t remember a time his dad had actually said those words. “I guess he’s more or less just said things like ‘you know why I won’t sell to you.’ I know he means that I can’t be trusted with a boat.”

Mia was silent for a moment. “I still can’t see it. That doesn’t sound like your dad at all.”

“People change. These things can affect you…” He stopped himself. Obviously, Mia didn’t need his platitudes. She knew even better than he did just how much these things could change a person.

“I think you should talk to your dad about it. Don’t let him off the hook. Yourself either. You can’t keep being so passive.” Mia’s eyes flashed. “Ask him straight up if he blames you for the accident. At least that way you will know for sure. You will have a way to move forward.”

“And risk losing a relationship with him for good? I don’t think I can take more losses in my life.”

“Cody.” Mia squeezed his hand. “Loss is inevitable here on earth. It’s how we deal with it that matters.”

He covered her hands with his other one. “When did you get so wise?”

“Eh, I’ve always been an old soul.” Mia flipped her hand, palm up on the table. He fitted his fingers between hers before meeting her eyes again. Unshed tears pooled in them.

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