Page 47 of Her Magic Light

“How do you feel?” Dr. Anderson sounded conversational but he held a clipboard in his hand.

“Fine,” I snapped.

“You sure?” He still sounded merely conversational, like his interest was casual.

“Sure. I mean, I’d be a hell of a lot better if I was at home in Sweetwater instead of here doing this crap, though.”

“Hmm.”

I bristled at the noise he made, and I nearly snapped at him again. But, instead, I tightened my hands around the ends of the armrests on the chair I sat in before deliberately relaxing my fingers and flattening them against the surface of the chair.

“Angry,” he muttered as he studied a screen in front of him and scribbled something on his clipboard. “Right. Orange.”

I closed my eyes and resisted the urge to spring from the seat.

“How do you feel now?”

“Fine. I mean, I should be doing something. There are things I need to do. People I need to contact. I’m here, but I don’t want to be here. Why am I here? Why won’t anyone tell me?” I suddenly turned into a motor-mouth as my thoughts spilled almost uncensored from me at a rapid pace. I started to stand. “I should get up. Exercise or something.”

“Sit down, Meira.” The light changed to yellow. “Orange makes her wired.” He glanced over his shoulder to Coop.

I held my head, turning away from the yellow light as my stomach turned and roiled. Nausea consumed me, and it was like being on a boat on a rough sea. I tried to close my eyes so I wouldn’t see it, but it didn’t help. “Turn it off, please.” I croaked out. “I feel really sick.”

“Green then.” With the flick of a button, my nausea receded, replaced by a feeling of sheer tranquility and calm.

I was the most relaxed I’d been since I arrived, and I almost closed my eyes. Nothing could bother me now. Everything would be okay. Even the noise of Dr. Anderson’s pen scratching across his paper wasn’t irritating, it simply existed.

My eyes were still closed when tears welled in them and hopelessness took root in my chest. I’d never get out of here. A sob escaped my chest, and the tears slid down my cheeks. I opened my eyes to find myself illuminated in blue, and I cried harder, my face twisting and inhuman noises ripping from my throat.

“Change the light,” Coop ground out.

Dr. Anderson was slow to comply, but he eventually spoke. “Indigo.”

I dried my tears on my sleeve as I tried to work out why I’d been crying. I couldn’t currently change my situation, so it seemed needless to cry over it.

“How do you feel?” This time the doctor sounded curious.

I shrugged. “I don’t know. Ancient. Wise? Like everything will be okay. Like I could examine all my thoughts, and it would all still be okay.”

“Interesting.” He wrote another note. “Lastly, violet.”

Relief washed over me, followed by love for my fellow man. Even now, evenhere, I felt like I understood what they were doing. Their execution might have been wrong, but their motivations were probably justified. I wanted to learn more so I understood. I sighed, generally at peace with my surroundings, and I… Iloved.

I smiled, and Dr. Anderson jotted something else down. “Interesting. Agent Cooper—” He tossed a smile over his shoulder. “I do believe Miss White might be feeling the lurve right about now.” He glanced at the screen then back at me, amusement gleaming in his eyes.

With supreme effort, I ripped the cap off. I didn’t like being out of control…being under someone else’s fucking control like this. Not like this.

“Now, now,” he said. “We’re not finished. But this next part is easier.

“Are you opening the shutters again? Please open the shutters.” I hadn’t meant to beg. “None of that light makes me feel like the sun does.”

A small, malevolent smile took control of his mouth. “Not today. That would skew all of my results. We’re going to do something much more interesting.” He pressed some more switches and the lights began to dim until we were sitting at dusk.

I yawned.

“Tired?” he suggested.

Yeah, althoughsluggishwas more the word I’d have used to describe it. And I was emotionally exhausted from whatever he’d done with the colors. Too many highs and lows. Too much to experience.