Page 2 of Mine

I tried to tell myself I was overreacting. That this wasn’t a sign of him not being a good partner. That this didn’tmean I couldn’t depend on him. That this didn’t prove he was inconsiderate. Incapable of doing something for me even if he didn’t want to. That this didn’t prove I wasn’t a priority to him. I tried to tell myself none of those things were true, but as I pulled my BMW out of my assigned parking space, I realized how hard I was working to turn those red flags pink.

When Houston called me, I sent it to voicemail. At this point, I wasn’t sure there was anything else for us to discuss. Principle was important to me. For him, he was simply skipping out on a group date. For me, his absence showed me I couldn’t depend on him, and right now… I didn’t like how that felt.

For the entire drive to Fleming’s, I questioned if now was the time for me to cut Houston off. Since we weren’t in a committed relationship, there was no reason for me to tolerate things that made me unhappy or uncomfortable. In no rush to get out, I called my only consistent friend Autumn. We never really talked on the phone unless we were making plans to go out, and I liked it that way. I was a loner by nature, and Autumn was the same way. Though we may not have talked and texted, we enjoyed each other’s presence and caught up on life when we did get together once or twice a month.

“Hey, girl,” she answered, slightly out of breath.

“Hey. Did I catch you at a bad time?”

“I’m on the treadmill. What’s up?”

“I’m at this dinner with Paisley and I was gonna see if you could come but—”

The other line beeped, causing me to pull the phone away from my ear to look and see who was calling me. I was fifteen minutes early, so it couldn’t have been my sister. At the sight of the picture of me and Houston that I had saved for his contact, my eyes rolled.

“Let me call you back, Autumn.”

“Okay.”

After switching over to Houston, I greeted him with, “Yes?”

“I’m here.”

My heart dropped. “Where?”

“The restaurant, Presly. Where did you park?”

“Oh. You didn’t have to come. It’s clear you didn’t want to.”

“Yeah, well… I don’t want you mad at me. Plus I’m hungry so…”

Gritting my teeth didn’t stop my smile from spreading. Somehow, just when I was ready to cut Houston loose, he seemed to always have a way to tether himself to me even tighter.

After Dinner

When Houston asked me to follow him to the store after dinner, I wasn’t sure what he was up to. He came to my car holding red roses and my favorite snack—grapes and lemonade. After giving me the items, he kissed me and said, “I’m sorry I made you mad earlier. You know I’m an only child and I’m spoiled. I ain’t used to putting somebody other than my mama first. I’m working on it though.”

A hard exhale escaped me. I was tired of that being his excuse for the past ten months. True, he was a spoiled mama’s boy. However, he was thirty-two years old. I knew he was twoyears younger than me, but I wasn’t expecting the age difference to make him seem so immature at times. Or maybe it wasn’t immaturity. Maybe it was just… a man acting out who was used to having his way. Either way, I didn’t like that shit—atall. I gave him credit for making amends with changed behavior though. Problem was, the changed behavior didn’t always last.

“You forgive me?” Houston confirmed before kissing me again.

“Yes.”

“Good. Let’s go back to your place.”

We did, and he continued his efforts to get back on my good side by eating my pussy until all my energy and cum were drained. Then, he made his way to the opposite side of my bed, head buried in his phone, while I watched a couple of movies until I fell asleep.

The Next Day

I straddled the line between being content in my solitude and wanting more. I wasn’t the kind of woman who had to talk to a man all day every day, and quality time certainly wasn’t my love language. But there were times being a loner felt…lonely. There were times I grew tired of dating and being single. Times I wanted someone who was mine and only mine. Someone who was a soft landing after a hard day at work. Someone who made love feel easy when life was hard.

Sometimes I thought I could have those things with Houston, then he’d say or do something to remind me that would never be the case. Take tonight for instance. A few of my cousins were in Memphis visiting from Chicago, so I was getting ready to spend some time with my family. I could admit I never dressed for the male gaze, but when I was dating or in a relationship, I dressedin a way that accentuated my curvy, cinnamon brown frame to appeal to his senses.

I was dressed in an oversized cropped graphic tee, cargo pants, and Nikes. My jet black, waist length hair had the addition of K-tips, providing thickness and layered length. My next hair appointment wasn’t until next week, so I put on a snapback that matched my shoes to avoid having to put heat on my hair. Now I knew I looked good in my dressed down attire, and it wasn’t something I’d wear on a date night with Houston unless we were going to a game or something, so I didn’t care how he felt about the look.

But I was still caught off guard when he said, “I don’t like that shit.”

The outburst was so random I didn’t think he was talking to me. I looked at the TV, figuring he was talking about whatever he was watching.

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