Those were sweet words back then, but I didn't believe them. I was so paranoid about getting attacked again for the longest time, I distrusted every person who tried to reassure me of my safety.

Just like I don't believe his words now. There's no way in hell I'm getting out of this.

I pull away from my dad, still refusing to look at Beck, who is standing no more than two feet from us. When my dad looks down at me, I say in a shaky voice, "Can we go home?"

My dad looks hesitantly at Beck, and even though I'm not looking his way, I can feel the irritation vibrating off him.

"For fuck's sake, Sela," Beck grits out, and his hand is then on my arm, turning me to face him. "Your home is with me."

"But--"

"You're coming back to the condo with me," he rolls right over me.

I pull my arm away, take a step back. Beck looks pissed and hurt at the same time. I notice my father turns from us and walks a few feet away to give us privacy. This tells me immediately that he is siding with Beck on this. By the mere fact that my father isn't pulling me down the street to his car right this minute tells me that he thinks I belong with Beck.

I just can't believe that.

Turning back to Beck, I nervously tuck my hair behind my ears with both hands and tell him with a raised chin, "Beck, don't you think this is over between us? I got you caught up in my crime, and I'm now trying to make things right. But to do that, you've got to let me go."

"You seriously can't be that naive," he says curtly with narrowed eyes. And damn...he looks so beautiful even in his complete disgruntlement with me. Nothing would make me happier than to just walk right into him, snuggle in tight, and hang on.

Never let go.

But that's a pipe dream now.

My dad turns around quickly on us and puts an arm around my shoulder. "Honey, why don't we all go to the condo and talk this through. Beck and I have some thoughts, and frankly, you two need each other more than ever."

"How can you even say that?" I ask him in astonishment. "I've ruined our lives by my actions."

Beck makes a scoffing noise, but when I risk a glance at him, he's still glowering, his hands now shoved deep in his pockets.

"Sela," my dad says calmly. "Let's go to the condo. We've got things to discuss, and when we're done, if you want to come home with me, I'll take you there. Okay?"

What I really want to do is stick my head in the sand, my ass in the air, and become the proverbial ostrich. I want to ignore all of this, go to my childhood bed and stay in with the covers pulled over my head until they come to cart me away forever.

But one more hard look at Beck, past the anger in his eyes, I still see a deep and abiding love within them. No matter how mad he is at me, I don't think I killed the good stuff.

At least I hope.

I look at my dad and nod. "Okay. Let's go."

--

I rode in the backseat of Beck's car, my dad in the front. I really wanted to ask my dad where his car was, but the silence was so heavy I was afraid my words would sound like a thunderclap. Besides, I have to assume it's at Beck's place and they rode to the courthouse together as a means of solidarity.

Once we get to the condo, Beck goes straight to the kitchen to make coffee and some tea, while I mumble about wanting a quick shower. I didn't get one at the sheriff's department today, although I was given a bar of soap to wash my face, as well as a small toothbrush with what felt like bamboo stakes for bristles and a flat-tasting toothpaste. I felt the grunge of crime sticking to me and needed to wash it off.

I come back into the living room, my long hair wet and wrapped up in a bun, but otherwise fully dressed and ready to hightail it out of here when we're done. I sit on the couch beside my dad and see a cup of tea cooling before me on the coffee table. Beck is standing near the window-wall with his hands in his pockets.

He appears ready for a difficult conversation, much like he did when I told him all the details of my rape. He doesn't look as uncomfortable, but still a bit angry and wary of me.

Yes...of me.

There's something about me and my presence in his life at this moment that is making him wary.

I'm totally going home with my dad tonight.

No doubt.

With a regretful sigh, I look at Beck and say, "I'm sorry I went behind your back to the police station. But I don't regret my actions."

"Of course you wouldn't," he says bitterly. "If you did, you'd have to admit how stupid that was."

This pisses me off, and even though my dad says "Sela" on a low note of warning, I stand from the couch, pin him with my death glare, and say, "You should be thanking me, Beck."

"Oh yeah...how's that?" he snaps back at me.

"Because I'm taking responsibility for my crime. I'm freeing you so you can go on with your life, and I'm doing that because I love you."

In three long steps, Beck crosses the room toward me, coming to stand on the opposite side of the coffee table. "I hate to be the one to break this to you, babe, because clearly you're in the dark, but your confessing to this crime didn't free me at all. It just ensured we're going to be tried together as coconspirators in JT's death."

"What?" I gasp, actually falling back down to the couch in a defeated slump.

"The ADA isn't going to drop the charges against me," he says, and his words slice into me like a million paper cuts. "She has no reason to. Nothing you've tol

d them disproves that I did it."

"But it's a confession," I mutter, glancing down at my tea because I can't stand to see the look of reproach in Beck's eyes. "They should accept it and be done with this."

"Oh grow up, Sela," Beck says in frustration with his hands out. "This isn't all about you, you know."

"Okay, that's enough," my dad says, and levels Beck with a look that says shut the fuck up. Then he turns that same look on me. "What's done is done. Now it's time to figure out what to do about it."

Beck turns away, walks over to the windows again, and stares out, his arms crossed over his chest. I have no clue what to say. I mean, I just assumed that when I met with Kerry next week, we'd prepare and hope for the best at the preliminary hearing. I also assumed the judge would find enough evidence to hold me over for trial. Then I assumed that the ADA would come to Kerry and offer some sort of plea deal so that this could all go away and she'd get a mark in her win column.

That was how it worked.

Right?

"We need to run," Beck says quietly, and I'm quite sure I heard that wrong.

My head snaps up to look at him, but he doesn't turn around. I then turn to look at my dad beside me and he looks at me with raised eyebrows and hopeful eyes for my future.

And it's at this point that I realize Beck and my dad have this all figured out.

"You want us to run?" I ask Beck.

He doesn't respond, so I stand up from the couch, round the coffee table, and walk up to him. I come to stand beside him but still keep a bit of distance between us and look at his profile. His jaw is set, his eyes are determined as they stare out over the bay.

"You want us to run?" I repeat.

Beck's head turns slowly my way and he looks down at me. His arms remain crossed over his chest and there's still a little bit of anger in his eyes, but his voice is so very gentle...almost pleading. "I want us to have a life together. The only way we're assured of it is if we run."

"But...but...how?" I ask in disbelief that this is even an option.

"I've got a call into Dennis," Beck says as he turns to me, his arms falling to his sides. "I've got millions at my disposal. With his contacts and my fortune, you and I could disappear."