Page 47 of Married to the Earl

She’d had trouble at first, reconciling the two different versions of Conor that she had seen. The distant and disengaged Earl of Middleborough and the thoughtful and kind man she had married. But now she saw the reason for the two distinct personalities.

He’s protecting himself. He’s protecting his business. He can’t show weakness in public. That’s why he seems so hard all the time.

It would spell disaster for him if this man, this Killian O’Flannagan, came to realize that his assaults on Conor’s character were effective. And worse yet, there were things Conor cared about that O’Flannagan didn’t know about. Things that could be used to hurt him.

Of course he doesn’t want anyone to know that side of him.

She looked up at her husband. Conor was watching her, and she knew him well enough now to read the hints of anxiety on his face. The tiny wrinkle between his eyebrows. The way he had sucked his lower lip into his mouth, just slightly.

He was concerned about how she would respond to Mr. Wilson.

So she forced a light laugh. “Whoever this O’Flannagan person is, he’s fighting a losing battle,” she said mildly. “I can’t believe there’s anything he could do that would impact my husband.” She turned to look at him and said, “I’m surprised you’ve noticed his efforts at all.”

The muscles in Conor’s face seemed to relax. He gave her a small, almost imperceptible smile.

Mr. Wilson laughed, completely missing the unspoken conversation that had taken place. “That’s right,” he said. “Smart girl you’ve married, Conor. She understands more than I would have expected.”

“Yes,” Conor said, slowly and softly. “She’s very clever.”

Astrid ate in silence for the rest of the meal, speaking only when spoken to and doing her best to give the impression that she was a well-behaved young lady. She understood more than ever now how important appearances were to Conor and how vital it was that he not appear to be challenged by his wife in front of his business partner.

I can’t make him seem weak,she told herself fiercely.It could damage his prospects. As his wife, it’s my job to help him appear strong.

And she could do it.

She understood now why he had wanted to marry her, why he had considered it a fair trade. In exchange for pardoning her father for his crimes he had gotten a wife who could reinforce the public image he was trying to create.

I can do that for him, she resolved.It’s so very little to ask in exchange for everything he’s done for me and my family. I can do this.

She gave Mr. Wilson her most charming smile.

Chapter 19

Astrid began to venture out of her room during the day, even when not invited by her husband to do so. She was beginning to think of Middleborough Manor as her home.

Betsy was no longer her only friend, either, although she was growing acclimated to the respectful distance most members of the staff preferred to keep. Still, she could always count on the cook to offer her a hot bun if she stopped by the kitchen, and the seamstress was only too happy to show her the garments she was working on.

The day after Mr. Wilson’s visit, her head full of thoughts of her husband’s business entanglements, Astrid decided to pass the morning walking around the manor grounds. She hadn’t explored them yet and she was eager to see the lands that were now hers.

It all seemed much bigger than it did from her bedroom window, she realized as she made her way across the sloping lawn. It was a good thing the manor loomed so large in the distance, or she might have gotten lost.

She walked until she reached a low stone wall that she guessed marked the boundary of her husband’s property. Then she turned and walked along the perimeter for a while, thinking to get an idea of just how big around the land was. She abandoned that idea, though, when she realized she’d done nothing to mark her starting point.I won’t know when I’ve made it all the way around. I could end up walking in circles forever.

Perhaps it had been foolish to try to explore the grounds on her own. She would ask Conor to give her a tour the next time it was convenient to him.

Of course, that might not be for a while.

It had become clear over the course of their meal last night that Mr. Wilson’s true reason for visiting had not been a social one. He was concerned about the state of their business. Astrid had felt incredibly guilty listening to that conversation.

They earned less money last month than they ordinarily would have because of my father. Because he stole from them, she thought.And that money was never replaced because Conor chose to marry me instead of pursuing legal action.

Although neither of the men had said anything accusatory to Astrid, Mr. Wilson had also made it clear that Conor had spent too much time at home lately, and not enough tending to the needs of his business.And that’s because of me, too. He’s neglecting his responsibilities in order to take care of me.

How could she ever have doubted his kindness, his thoughtfulness? How could anyone? He was such a good man.

I’m going to do whatever I have to do to help him succeed, she vowed to herself again. It was a mantra she had been repeating in her mind since dinner last night, going so far as to whisper it to herself as she was falling asleep.I’m going to be a good wife.

Perhaps that started with letting him see that she was comfortable on her own, that he didn’t have to stay at home with her anymore. Maybe then he would be ready to resume the responsibilities of his business.

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