Page 2 of Threads of Fate

“I should maybe get back before MeeMaw has a freak-out. Bye, ma’am.” He backed away, and with a final wave, he let the wolf lead him out of the glade.

Goodbye, Phoenix Rena. Be good and I’ll see you soon.

His mother would tell the story later that when they’d found him, he’d insisted that he’d seen a large wolf and had followed it off the trail and that he’d met the summer-y Mrs. Claus who wasn’t really, and that she’d kissed him on his cheek even though she hadn’t asked. That she had called him Phoenix because he wasn’t in trouble. His shoe and sock had been soaking wet, andhe’d rambled about how good she’d smelled; like cookies. Told them he’d been polite.

Instead of being proud, MeeMaw had looked at him strangely and asked him where he’d gotten a wet shoe. Nix tried to describe the crashing whoosh of the water and the rainbow of fishes, but she had scoffed. There were no waterfalls in this area, and certainly no rainbow fishes. She’d scolded him for walking off and pinched him for lying. But he knew he hadn’t lied; Nix was a good boy, after all.

The next day at a road stop just outside of Chattanooga, halfway home, his mama noticed a little heart-shaped freckle on his cheek that she was sure hadn’t been there before. Years later, the story of the freckle had turned fantastical. His mum would say that an angel had kissed him there and because he was so full of love for all people and all living things, it was shaped like a heart.

***

The second was when Nix was fourteen and he met a boy.

Well, almost a man. Nix had fallen in love at first sight. He’d answered the door at their rented beach house, and Ivy’s sort-of-boyfriend—but really just a friend—had been standing there, holding a backpack with his surfboard strapped to the top of his old, tomato-red Corolla. He was tall, with bleached-blond hair, eyes the color of forests, and a smile that made Nix’s cheeks burn.

The boy had returned his stare, with wide eyes, and with his nose in the air, until he’d dropped the backpack to stick out his hand. “I’m Jamie. Hi.” Realizing he had just tried to shake another kid’s hand, Jamie smoothly rubbed his neck instead.

“Nix. Uh…I’m Nix.” His heart had pounded so hard, that Nix felt like he might fall over.

“Can I come in?” Jamie had smiled; dimples deep in his cheeks and faint freckles on his nose.

In those thirty seconds of painfully awkward introductions, Nix knew his life would never be the same. He was in love.

So he smiled right back.

Jamie’s jaw dropped and Nix had laughed, but just stepped back to let him in, thinking that maybe, just maybe, this boy liked him, too.

The following week had been amazing, and they’d spent it getting tanned and even more freckled. Ivy hadn’t minded that Jamie paid more attention to Nix than to her at all. There had been a pretty girl two houses up on the beach, and Nix guessed his sister and Jamie had talked about it because she was over there more than she was with the Renas.

There’d been campfires where Jamie had told him about his music and his dreams. Jamie had tried to teach him to surf and how to build the best sandcastles, all while looking at him like Nix was the best thing to exist. His everything.

By the end of their vacation, Nix’s parents hadn’t hesitated to let the “responsible and respectful” Jaime Rhodes drive the two hours back home with Nix in shotgun, music turned up loud and lips sticky with the vanilla ice cream they’d stopped for along the way.

Watching Jamie sing the latest rock country ballad while looking at Nix out of the corner of his eye had made a new heat build in his belly because Jamie was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen. Desire had been new to Nix, and even though he didn’t know what exactly he wanted; whatever itwould be,he knew it would be with Jamie.

That feeling was enough to have him confessing: “I really like you, Jamie. Like really, really.”

Jamie had smiled so big, not surprised, but certainly thrilled. He’d gripped the steering wheel tightly. “Nixie. Shit. I really,reallylike you, too.”

It sounded like there was a “but” coming. “But you’re still young, and I’m way older, right? So for now, we’ll be like best friends. Okay? Because…you need to grow up before we can be anything else, yeah?”

Nix wasn’t disappointed because being anything of Jamie’s was a really great thing.

So friends they were. The best of friends. Friends who went places, just the two of them; to the beach, arcades, and the movies. They held hands and hugged the best hugs Nix had ever had. Jamie sang songs and played his guitar over the phone on video calls late at night after his parents had gone to sleep, or in his car as they sat in the parking lot of McDonald’s while they dipped french fries into vanilla milkshakes.

But even if there weren’t any kisses, those sure were dates and if Jamie wasn’t aware of it, then he wouldn’t feel obligated to stop them, so Nix kept his mouth shut. It was the best spring and summer Nix had ever spent, and he had not expected it to come crashing down so soon.

When Jamie told him he was going to Nashville at the end of the fall semester to make music, Nix had been so proud. He’d already been scouted for a brand new reality show where he would be paired with other up-and-coming talented artists. Jamie liked to perform, but he loved to make music most of all, and making connections was his biggest goal, whether or not the show ever aired. Nix had swallowed his sadness and hugged him until they were both breathless and then they’d had pizza to celebrate.

He’d been so proud, but that night he’d also cried so hard he’d thrown up.

After that, he tried not to count down the days and to live in the moment. Fall and the start of school came and went and Nix had largely blocked it from his mind. It was easily done right up until the week of Christmas vacation. They wanted to spendevery waking minute together, and they’d found themselves at the mall again for lack of anything better to do. There’d been a photo booth and despite the four dollars it cost, Jamie had insisted. Nix had even gotten a quick cheek kiss in at the very end and Jamie had been so red in the face; happy in spite of how strict he tried to be with that kind of thing.

He gave Nix that last picture and said he’d keep the others safe until Nix could come to Nashville for school. Jamie had explained that he wouldn’t be back in Florida for a few years, that the filming schedule was strict, and that his dad wasunsupportive.Of what Jamie hadn’t said, but Nix suspected it had been less about the music and more about not liking Nix.

The night before Jamie was to leave, they’d walked down to the football field and jumped the fence, then lay in the wet grass and looked up at the stars. Jamie had held his hand, and they’d both cried. Despite the plans for the future, promises of video calls, and maybe even a visit to Nashville someday soon, they both knew it wouldn’t be the same.

That night Nix slept poorly—or maybe even not at all—after Jamie had gone home, and when the sun had come up, he’d begged his mom to drive him the ten minutes to Jamie’s house so he could have a few last hours together.

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