Page 137 of Bonds of Fate

Two hours fly by, and Grayson is startled when Rowan arrives carrying a vase of pink flowers and then makes a second trip for the food from the to-do list Grayson had given Jay.

“Hey, where do you want these?” There are two insulated cooler bags, one with hot food and another with fruit, dessert, and a bottle of wine.

“Over here, thanks. I thought you were with Luca?” Grayson asks.

Rowan’s tone is distracted, and his whole demeanor is more fidgety than usual. Maybe he has some feelings about Gideon’s date in the same way Jay had?

“Nah…” Rowan put the vase of pink flowers on the table by the bed and the coolers by the low table near the fireplace. He sits heavily on the bed and picks up a flameless candle out of its box, flicking the switch on and off. He’s leaking, anxious, spiced rum scent all over the place.

Grayson takes a seat beside him, opens another box of candles, and waits until Rowan decides he wants to talk. He has long ago learned that Rowan Foster sometimes needs a few minutes to get to the point. Handing the candles one-by-one toRowan, they work through the box until they eventually have turned on almost all four dozen of the battery-operated candles.

Grayson will place them around the bed once Rowan has gone back inside. Was it cliched and cringy? Probably. Does he care? Probably. Is he going to do it, anyway? Fuck, yes. Because Grayson hopes Nix will love it.

“Gray?” Rowan asks softly.

“Hmm?”

“Nix got hurt today when he was training with Gideon.”

Grayson is on his feet, dumping the last six candles on the floor in a heap. Nix had gotten hurt, and Grayson hadn’t felt a thing. The bond bite is incomplete, but Grayson still felt twinges occasionally. How had he not noticed? What the fuck?

“Stop. He’s alright. He’s with Luca in his room getting ‘dolled up.’” Rowan makes those weird hand quotes he mocks Jay for doing. “He’s a bit pissed, but that’s not because of Gideon. It’s because Jay got mad—really, really madat Gideon.”

Grayson sits his ass down and focuses on breathing calmly to convince his racing heart that it’s fine—that Rowan wouldn’t lie to him.

He picks up the remaining candles off the floor and hands them one-by-one to Rowan until they’re all on, and the collective glow might draw attention from space, it’s so bright. It works to keep Rowan talking, and Grayson needs the entire story fast.

“As long as everyone’s okay.”

“It was scary for a minute. Jay said some stuff that I think needed saying, but Lucayelledat Jay. It was awful. He’s never mad. Right? He’s bratty, and sometimes he gets annoyed, but I haven’t ever smelled him like that before. And Nix? He was so…cold. Then Jay burned out of there on his bike—the gate almost didn’t open in time.” Rowan delivers the events rapid-fire, and his voice catches at the end, tapering off into a whisper.

“Our family is falling apart, and I don’t understand why. Having Nix is the most amazing thing. I can feel him here.” Ro rubs his hand just under his belly button and smiles the tiniest smile. “It’s like the warmest fire, and it helps me remember that he loves me—all the time.”

“But?”

“But everyone is sad, or mad, or scared, and it’s freaking me out. I feel like I’ve missed some important shit while I was in rut, and now I’m thrown into this shit-storm, and I can’t swim. Wait, no. Overboard? Yeah, I was thrown overboard, and I can’t swim. Even though Iactuallycan. That’s a metaphor, you know?”

Grayson smiles ruefully.Yes, he knows.

“Why is it so hard? I’m scared.” He presses into Grayson’s side so Grayson can throw an arm around his shoulder. Rowan has always struggled most when Jay is under pressure and is at his most “human.” He needs a solid Jay—a solid alpha leader—and while no one can blame their alpha, times like these are extra hard on Rowan, who has always used Jay as his emotional barometer.

“Ah, my little baby,” Grayson coos, even though there is no world where Rowan Foster could be consideredlittle. He knows he shouldn’t tease, but he can’t help trying to pull his mate back from the volatile edge he’s skirting.

“Fuck off. Why do you always have to be a shit to me?” Rowan squirms and tries to throw him off, but Grayson just holds on.

“I’m sorry. Sorry. Okay, seriously. I’m a shit to you because you rise so perfectly to the bait,andyou are fucking hot when you do it.”

Rowan blushes, obviously torn.

“But as for the others. It’s okay to be scared, Ro. I get scared, too.” Rowan looks startled. If Grayson is scared, then maybe it lends credence to his worries. “But families argue, right? We areall going through stuff that’s extra hard. Nix is the missing piece we’ve been waiting for forever.”

For Grayson, it feels like it’s been lifetimes. “But he’s been through so much, and it’s not his fault. He has to do some hard things so he can heal.”

“But he doesn’thave to. He’s choosing this when he doesn’t have to. I can see why Jay is mad.”I’m mad, too,goes unsaid.

Boy, does that sound familiar. Hadn’t Grayson said the same thing to Jay just yesterday? Good thing he got solid advice then—because now he can pass it on. He can only imagine why Jay is suddenly pissed; seeing Nix wounded in training with someone who loves him would only make it easier to picture how much worse it could have been with Hayes, fueled by nothing but hatred.

“Jay isn’t mad at Nix. He’s mad at the guy who hurt him, and the idea that Nix could get hurt is terrible. I know you are worried too, right?” Rowan nods, his eyes glinting in the light of forty-eight candles. “But if you think he doesn’t have to do this for himself, that he has made this decision lightly, then you should talk to him.”

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