Page 65 of Bonds of Fate

Nix means it. He can feel it in his belly: if Luca says he’s good, then he knows it’s true, and maybe he can follow his mate’s lead and let go a bit tonight, too.

“I’m really,reallygood, Nixie. So good. I want you to feel good, too. Do you want to play with me?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t know if I want the same things as you.”

Luca’s jaw drops a bit, and he huffs in a short laugh. “No, I don’t think you do, or at least not right now. Or probably ever. But that’s for tomorrow’s Luca and Nix. Tonight, I wanna dressyou up and suck your dick. Maybe eat some of that slick that fuckingeverybodyis talking about. What do you think?”

He’s got a twinkle in his eye and a smirk on his face.

“Yes.” Nix breathes it out, and it’s as easy as that—Nix trusts Luca to know himself and maybe help him do the same.

“Yessss!” A literal fist pump and a happy jump up have Luca catching his breath again. “I keep forgetting that it’s in there.”

“Can I see?”

Luca hesitates—conflict marring his sweet face. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Gideon says if I come again without permission, I am not going to for a week. Aweek, Nixie. That’s forever in the Luca universe. Forever. Can’t risk it.”

He’s pulling Nix toward the bathroom.

Nix understands that the two of them are combustible. Twice now, they’ve almost come together. Nix wants there to be a third time for real.

“Can I do your hair? Gideon did mine with red bows, and I picked out pink ones for you. If you wanted?”

Nix’s heart melts at the tone, as if he might not want exactly whatever Luca wants for the foreseeable future.

“Please. He says you have something for me to wear. Can I see?” This time, Luca detours toward the bed and returns with the softest, silkiest pink slip dress.

Nix hasn’t much experience with sexy nightgowns or dresses, but he has always liked to feel pretty—even if he has never had much opportunity before now.

“They’ll be coming for us soon, I think. Can I help you? See if you like it, and if not, we can choose something else.” Luca puts the pink dress back on the edge of Gideon’s bed and grabs the hem of Nix’s t-shirt before pausing. “Okay?”

Nix can’t help but smile.

It seems to slow Luca down for a moment, but he shakes it off and pulls Nix’s t-shirt over his head in one swift motion.

“Fuck, Nixie. Fuck. How are you for real?”

It’s almost a whisper, full of awe.

“I’m nothing like you, Luca. I’m too thin, and my freckles aren’t as nice as Rowan’s are. I’m ugly.”

“What?! You’re beautiful. Jay told us that change takes everything that’s the best about you and keeps it forever, but to me, you have always been beautiful. Even the Goddess must love your freckles because they’re so pretty, baby. One of these days, I’m going to count every single one with kisses.”

Luca is so earnest that Nix wants to believe him, buthisvoice still rings in his ears, whispering about how ugly they are.

Nix remembers how he tried to burn each one off with a cigarette. He hadn’t even smoked—he’d just bought them to hurt Nix.

At least he hadn’t started with the ones on his face.

The memory slips out of the box without permission, hitting him so hard he sways, dizzy and unsteady.

“Whoa, there. Are you okay?” Luca’s finger is under his chin, and he tilts it up. “What did I say?”

“Nothing. Can I try the dress now? Please?” He desperately does not want to talk to sweet Luca about cigarettes and screams, and he’s not sure he could lie well enough not to bring Luca out of his floaty place—instinct tells him that would be bad.

“I…okay. If you’re sure?” Nix is grateful his mate isn’t focused on anything but where Gideon has led him. It really is a miracle. Nix hopes he’s not bad for wanting a bit of that for himself.

“I’m good, baby. That dress is so pretty, gimme.”