Page 139 of Stutter

My eyes snap open and Jonas climbs onto the bed I’m strapped to, straddling me. A weightless ghost. But that moth is still fluttering inside of me. “Look who came to visit.”

They grow out of the sides of his neck. Chase. Riordan. Blue eyes now grey like ash. They move around like serpents, and I whimper, doing my best to get away but I can’t. I let out a sob and shut my eyes tight.

Not real.

I keep my eyes closed. I piss myself. I ignore the taunts. I sing to myself to drown out their voices until it’s quiet.

Then I make the mistake of opening my eyes and it starts all over again.

My sweet Kronos is a hellhound. Lucifer is a giant skeletal cat with fleshy bat wings. Maverick is a demon, Damon’s just watching me, eyes glowing like silver flames and Jonas has no eyes. The twins float and circle above me. The light, the fucking light simply sways, casting more imaginary shadows that were once trapped in my mind.

I don’t know how long it takes. Hours. Days. I’m starving. I’m wet, itchy and smell of my urine, there’s no Lex this time to find me. Even if Shadow showed up, this one only watches from the corner, still as can be.

Dirty boots. Hands in his pockets. He's the only thing that doesn’t shift or change into something or someone else.

I drift, finally, shivering asleep, twitching.My hair itches. My skin burns, my brain feels like it’s on fire but I’m so very, very cold. I can’t feel my toes.

And then it’s warm again…

When my eyes shut for good to give me a moment’s peace… I dream of them.

The real them.

“We’re coming, baby…”

“I love you, Amourette…”

“We’ll burn them down for you, Siren. Nobody will survive.”Retreating whispers that fill me with hope as I drift drift drift…

And a melody begins to form. Soft, at first, in adagio, a cello. Low and forewarning. The tempo accelerates with the accompaniment of violins… a piano causes goosebumps to break on my skin and a clash of cymbals.

My nipples peak from the cold, rubbing against the material of the hospital gown. I shiver as I dream of bathing in Stephen’s warm blood wearing my mask and nothing but the mask that he thinks is a butterfly.

I can be good.

I’ll be so good.

“Raven baby…”

I don’t dare open my eyes.

“We’re coming, angel.”

Beautiful lies.

“Gorgeous little bird.”

Tears well into my eyes and seep out, warm against my face.

________

There’s atap, tap, tappingagainst my cheek.

My eyes flutter open.

Blurry blue eyes. Blonde hair.

I don’t allow myself to give him the satisfaction of hearing me scream.

---