Page 75 of Stutter

“People think sending something off to a lab takes a few hours like it does on TV, but the reality is, is that it can takeweeks. We were scouring everything, everywhere, questioning everyone and nobody saw a goddamned thing… it took another year for the same thing to happen. This time a mother and her twin six-year-old daughters driving back from Disneyland in California. Their neighbors were the ones that reported them missing. The mother was recently divorced from her shitty spouse, had gotten her dream job and was finally able to afford a family vacation if they road-tripped instead of flying. It was a dream come true for her. This time the mother was left behind at the scene of the crime with skin under her fingernails where she fought against her attacker. But everything else was the same MO, and the specimen from under her nails matched that one drop of blood from the year before.

“Whatever was going on, the perp was escalating mentally, and we decided to search that stretch of highway and found seven farms. Hundreds of acres where someone could hide their victims. Hide their bodies…”

Raven squirms in my arms.

“We finally had enough evidence point to the surrounding areas and we were able to get more cops to help question andsearch.” He clears his throat and his hand trembles along with his voice when he swallows thickly before proceeding. “When I walked onto the Ackles farm, it had just rained, and it immediately smelled like death. We had cops from three different cities helping us but when I walked on that farm… this whooshing in my ears wouldn’t stop. My stomach fell through my ass and all I wanted to do wasleave. I don’t know what made me ignore Tasha who was going to the main house to speak to the owner, but something told me to go to the barn. Call it divine intervention or simply intuition, but it felt so heavy.Evil. The air was so thick and dense, and the mud was making me slip but I kept going. The barn looked like it hadn’t seen any upkeep in decades and the closer I got; the hogs were making this…sound. They were feeding and the splashing and crunching noises- I-” he looks like he’s going to be sick.

“I saw little blonde curls in the mud. I thought, ‘oh no, she fell, I have to help her before she’s trampled…’and I pulled her to me but the pigs - I didn’t understand at first. It didn’t make sense. I was there! I wasrightthere!” He points to the ground in frustration. “But she didn’t cry out, didn’t talk… didn’t… she didn’t…” an angry tear rushes down his face and it makes Raven jump out of my lap and dive to him as he wipes it away quickly.

She doesn’t climb into his lap to hold him. No, our perfect girl sinks to her knees and immediately puts her head in his lap, and holds his leg to her chest, subservient to him, waiting for a command to give him what he needs but our perfect girl has done just that. His hand goes to her silky strands, and he clears his throat, sniffing once, keeping his gaze on the top of her head, avoiding ours.

“I heard three gunshots go off by the time I had pulled her out of the pin.” He blinks thrice and clears his throat one last time, a man battling his memories. “I wrapped up Mia, the girl, in my jacket and placed her into an officer’s arms, handed in my gun and badge to Tasha, and walked away. I walked and walked andwalkeduntil I got to the police department, asked to use their showers. Stripped, vomited everything I’d eaten into the drain, and then called my boss and put in my resignation effective immediately. I learned later on what they had to do to those pigsfor evidence…” he shakes his head. “Dozens of shoes and articles of clothing were laid out for the victim’s families to come and be able to identify them. Jerry’s parents weren’t able to identify them, but he was. I mean, he saw them almost every day on campus.”

We’re all quiet for a moment, Raven content with letting him pet her until he taps her head and then taps his thigh with two fingers when she looks up at him. She climbs up and settles into him, her face into his neck and he inhales when his arms curl around her middle, breathing in her scent. “So I didn’t go back.Couldn’tgo back. That type of evil… it shouldn’t exist.”

“So then you decided to teach others how to better catch a bad guy.” Jonas finishes Maverick’s story.

“Precisely,” he swallows, “hoping someone out there will do it better than me.”

“Why haven't you told anyone, Maverick?” I ask.

Maverick looks down at his trembling hands. “Guilt. Shame. I knew what had been happening and it took me so long to bring it up to my boss, but he was right. There wasn’t enough evidence to group them altogether. I should’ve gone to someone else, but I didn’t want… I didn’t want to be wrong and lead a manhunt for nothing. I also didn’t even know where to start until that drop of blood was found. It was a stroke of luck Mia’s mother had fought back before she died and the DNA came back as matching.”

“You must know finding the Ackles farm, your partner shooting him, you saved countless more young women and girls.”

“But I could’ve saved more if I hadn’t been a fucking coward.”

“Nobody here thinks you’re a coward, Harrington.” I say softly and his eyes finally meet mine. He doesn’t believe me, but his gaze softens. I know this is something he’s going to fight with himself for a very long time.

“I killed my pregnant ex-girlfriend and her stepbrother-slash-lover on their way to eloping.” Jonas says quietly. “It’s how I was initiated into the Syndicate. I didn’t have any witnesses, but my father signed as mine.” He tells us about how his ex-girlfriend almost raped him before having to go to Ireland to be with hisparents for their summer holiday but getting a message from Riordan that Paris was telling everyone he had been violent and tried to rape her. He sent a PI out and between the pictures of her and her stepbrother, Jacob Cartwright, fucking against his bedroom window and a hacker getting into the girl’s medical records, he found out she was pregnant. He flew back from Ireland in his family’s private jet and wanted to scare Jacob out of being with her.

“I just thought it was him in the car alone. I loosened his lug nuts, driving behind him in this huge SUV, swerving, making him drive off the road. I hadn’t meant for that to happen, either. I just wanted to scare him. To leave her alone. I was going to raise the baby as my own. Adopt it. You know? Like I was. He hit the rail guard, and I watched as paramedics pulled up their burnt bodies from the crash. That’s how I learned I had killed all of them. I didn’t know she was in the car with him. I didn’t know they were leaving to elope. It was the only time I hated my dad. Sometimes I still do,” Jonas sighs then looks over at Maverick. “I struggle with it every day. I get nightmares, too. Especially on the nights after an initiation or I have to go do a job for one of the Elders.”

I let him speak, Raven reaching over to place her hand on his thigh and squeezing just a bit and he places his large hand over hers, sending her a small smile.

“We all deal with things differently. When I found out Jacob had been the one that stabbed our girl, I felt a lot better about having killed him and getting away with it.”

“And Paris?” Maverick asks.

“Some days I feel terrible. But knowing I didn’t know, and that her death was an accident… I’m coming to terms with that on my own.” He nods at me with gratitude. “Damon’s been helping with that.”

Raven pulls her phone out of her pocket and when Maverick peeks over her shoulder he chuckles. “I don’t think a trip right now would be the best idea, Angel.”

She frowns and then hands her phone to Jonas. “A standing reservation, huh?”

She nods excitedly. “So..fff…ia w-w-won’t be… there. Too… busy w-w-with the… h-holiday p-party.”

“I think after all that sharing, we deserve a vacation.I’m game. Let’s fucking go!”

I quirk a brow. “Go where?”

Maverick’s eyes flash somewhat excitedly. “Barcelona. Paloma Hotel.”

“That’s her grandfather’s main hotel. I’ve never been to that one, only the ones in New York, Cali, and Australia.”

Maverick deadpans at the rich boy.

“But I’ve always wanted to go!” he says excitedly.

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